


To My Ready Room

by Calminaiel



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Bottom Kirk, Bottom Spock, Cheating, M/M, Mild S&M, Pon Farr, T'hy'la, a fair amount of plot, dubcon, lots of porn, spock and uhura never get it on
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-11
Updated: 2013-08-15
Packaged: 2017-12-23 03:46:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 24,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/921627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Calminaiel/pseuds/Calminaiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spock’s developing relationship with Uhura could not have come at a more inconvenient time, but the Captain is willing to help out in any way he can.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've gone through and edited this work. It is still un-beta'd, but hopefully I've caught most of the mistakes.

“Jim, I want you to be especially careful with this wrist for a few days. I’ve fused the bone and the remodelling process should be well underway, but if you go knocking it around you will wind up right back here, and I have better things to do than fix the same damn bones because you won’t exercise a little caution.” Luckily for Kirk, McCoy didn’t see Jim’s smile as he turned away. Leonard’s voice rang down the hall as he shouted after the captain, “and tell that pointy eared bastard that I don’t care how resistant Vulcan immune systems are to ‘commonplace exogenous pathogens’ when I say I want everyone to have a routine physical- I mean I want everyone on the damn crew to have a routine physical”

Jim shook his head and called back over his shoulder as he continued to the bridge “You knoq, I’d love to tell him that Bones, but I don’t wanna risk any confrontation that might jeopardize my wrist” He could hear McCoy swearing in frustration as he got into the turbolift.

“Main Bridge.”

“Spock to Captain Kirk.” Spock’s voice sounded slightly muffled as the turbolift began to move, “Captain, I have a matter that I would like to discuss with you at your convenience.” Spock’s voice was faintly distorted by the combadge, but the hint of impatience that Jim had come to know quite well was by no means absent. In that same moment the turbolift reached the main bridge and without losing a beat Jim strolled right over to Spock who stood, surprised, when the captain stepped onto the bridge.

“Of course, Spock.” Jim said, letting a mischievous smile play across his face as his first officer looked startled by the timely manner of his appearance on the bridge “What did you want to discuss?”

The bridge crew were all occupied with their duties, yet Spock made a point to lower his voice when he answered, “It is of a somewhat… personal nature, Captain. I would appreciate your discretion in this matter.” Jim noticed his eyes flick toward Lieutenant Uhura who was occupied explaining a series of Klingon honorific expressions to an ensign who had been hovering around the bridge for the last several days. Jim looked at Spock’s face, trying to work out what was different. The Vulcan’s features were just as sharp as ever, his hair fell perfectly, framing his face and emphasising his meticulous nature. The captain’s manner sobered, “Of course Spock, let’s talk in my ready room.” He made eye contact with Chekov who took the con as they walked into the adjacent room.

Spock looked around the room, certain that his discomfort was obvious as the captain silently observed him, waiting, he was sure, for him to explain what it was he wished to discuss.

“As I am sure you are aware,” he began, “Nyota and I have entered into a relationship in recent weeks.” As expected, Jim smiled, he knew how uncomfortable this discussion made Spock and he enjoyed nothing more than asking Spock whenever possible how their relationship was progressing. Spock, of course, saw no reason to indulge this little amusement of Jim’s and took steps to avoid speaking to him on the subject… of course, now he had very little choice. Spock ignored the captain’s smile and continued, “Starbase 683 is not far off our current course, as we are on no pressing missions, I would like to request permission to take several days shore leave on the Starbase.”

Kirk’s face changed, _surprise_ , Spock recognized, and a hint of confusion that played across his golden eyes, “For you and Lieutenant Uhura?” he sounded nearly as incredulous as he looked, scrutinizing Spock as if he hoped to glean some understanding from the Vulcan’s carefully composed expression.

“No Captain, for myself only.”

“I’m sorry Spock, what does this have to do with Uhura? Are you two having some sort of fight?” Spock could see Jim’s mind racing as he tried to connect the pieces of the puzzle. Spock was fascinated by the passion that the Captain showed when he was invested in a problem. Since they had first met he had been impressed by Jim’s aptitude for problem solving, even if he chose not to put it to good use.

“There are no current points of contention in my relationship with Lieutenant Uhura. I wish only to put in a formal request for a few days leave.”

Spock could see that Jim was ready to give in, “Ok fine Spock, Bones wants to do his routine physical on you and then you are free to take a shuttle-“

“I am sorry captain, I must insist that Doctor McCoy’s examination wait until I return.”

“Look Spock,” Jim’s voice was measured, but Spock could hear the frustration that the Captain rarely bothered to hide when his first officer proved to be particularly unwavering. “I understand that you don’t see the point in this physical because you’re never sick- and that’s fine, but it doesn’t have to be logical. It just has to get done. Bones is under a lot of pressure from Starfleet, especially after that last mission we all went on, he wants to make sure that everyone is in peak condition”

“On the contrary, I understand the pressure that Doctor McCoy is under as ship’s medical officer. I am afraid, Captain, that it is you who does not understand. I need to take this leave effective immediately, I will report to medical for my examination as soon as I return, but I am unable to remain on this ship.” Spock could hear the indignation in his own voice as he tried in vain to keep his emotions in check. He turned and began to leave the room.

“Commander Spock! As your captain I cannot let you leave this room without an explanation for this uncharacteristic behavior.” Spock stopped in his tracks. He was surprised at the effect that Jim’s commanding tone had had on him, surely it was simply a side effect of what was to come, but as he turned to face the captain he felt he was looking at a different man. This man wasn’t an overemotional human; he was a commanding Starfleet officer. Spock had seen Jim’s stern side only several times since he had taken command of the Enterprise. Most often he would use the stern manner when dealing with hostile diplomats, species about whom very little was known, or when he and his crew were in highly dangerous situations. _Perhaps he has gleaned more about the danger of the situation than I have given him credit for_ , Spock did not relish the idea of explaining his current predicament to the captain, but he knew that Jim would be willing to accommodate for his needs, albeit most likely with a lavish amount of ridicule.

Spock allowed himself a moment’s breath before speaking, his dark eyes remained downcast as he steepled his fingers in front of him and began speaking, his voice deliberate, “There is… a process of biological change that Vulcans undergo every seven years.” he paused and snuck a glance at the captain, hoping that perhaps he would find that sufficient. Kirk’s face remained unchangingly stern. Nevertheless, Spock could see the concern in his eyes, _concern for my wellbeing,_ he realized. “It is a deeply personal time for us as we are… not ourselves during this time”

Kirk’s impassivity faltered, “What do you mean, not yourself?”

Spock stood silent for a moment, collecting his thoughts. _If I tell him everything I will be breaking a sacred confidence among Vulcans_ . _Of course, it would be logical to give him the information he requires if it will provide him sufficient information to grant me leave. With the destruction of Vulcan, and of T’Pring, I have no choice but to seek a… convenient solution to the situation. I have no doubt that many things that were once held in strictest confidence among Vulcans will become less guarded as we attempt to repopulate and rebuild our race._ He looked carefully at his captain, a man who he had  initially hated, but Spock had come to have a strong respect for him. Jim often said that one day they would be great friends and, while Spock doubted that they would ever become that close, he knew that Jim took their relationship very seriously. “It is called Pon Farr, very few humans have ever heard the name. It is the Vulcan… mating cycle.” Spock continued observing Jim’s reactions carefully, “It happens to both male and female Vulcans and, before Nero’s ship destroyed my planet, it was the time in which we would undergo the Koonut Ka’lifee, our marriage ceremony. Now, with the loss of my planet, as well as most of our people, our traditions will have to be… altered, for a time at least.”

Kirk nodded, “So you only,” he cleared his throat, “mate during this time.”

“A Vulcan adult remains fertile throughout their adult life, we are more than capable of engaging in… sexual intercourse when we are not in Pon Farr… It is during this time that we _must_ mate.” He saw the confusion on Kirk’s face. “Pon Farr occurs on a 7 year cycle, when we begin Pon Farr, we have approximately 8 days, during which we must mate… or we die.” Shock could not accurately describe the look that came over Kirk’s face.

Spock watched him try to grasp what he had just been told. Slowly Jim’s face regained a measure of composure and he spoke, hesitantly, with most of the sternness gone from his voice, “Spock, I don’t want to overstep my bounds, but couldn’t you simply explain the situation to Lieutenant Uhura? I assume you guys… I don’t see why you don’t just go to her.”

Spock shook his head, “I told you that during Pon Farr we are not ourselves. The… superior physical strength that Vulcans possess could be harmful to a human mate. I am much stronger than the humans on this crew even when I am not in Pon Farr. I could grievously injure any of you with very little effort.” Something flashed across Jim’s face, it seemed to be amusement, though Spock couldn’t imagine that he doubted the truth in what the Vulcan said. “During Pon Farr... during the sexual encounters,” Spock looked away, fixing his gaze on the captain’s desk “I will behave in an uncharacteristic, even animalistic way. I will be unable to guarantee the safety of any human partner, and I would certainly not risk it with Nyota.”

Spock looked back at Jim, only to be completely taken aback by his expression. Kirk’s features were tense, his eyes wide with his lips slightly parted, at first Spock took the expression for shock, but then he realized it was more than that, _craving_. Spock tried to continue, but found he had little left to say, at any rate, he could not concentrate when Jim’s eyes flashed like that. “As I have now given you an explanation, I trust you will not attempt to delay my departure any further.”

Jim still looked a bit shaken, but when he spoke his voice was calm and resolute. “I think we could all use a little leave, I will order a change of course to Starbase 683, we should arrive in a number of hours. I’m sure Lieutenant Uhura has a number of tasks that she will want completed before she leaves the ship. In the meantime are you well enough to resume your duties on the bridge?”

“Yes captain, the symptoms are very mild when they are present this early.”

“Anything I should know about, symptom-wise? Are you sure you aren’t willing to speak to Bones? He might be able to give you some relief when the, um, symptoms begin.”

A smile flashed briefly across Spock’s face at Jim’s suggestion. “No, thank you Captain. I would prefer the entire situation remain between the two of us. The early symptoms are often similar to those experienced by humans infected by influenza, though the longer I wait, the less I will be able to… control my emotions.” Spock knew the serious implications of that, “None of the serious symptoms should manifest for at least another day.” Jim nodded and gestured that he would follow Spock onto the bridge.

Spock walked calmly and resolutely to his station keeping his gaze focused, though he was fully aware that Nyota was trying to catch his eye.

“I have just been in conference with Commander Spock and he and I have agreed that after such an exhausting week in the Tra’Karin System, we are all deserving of a little shore leave.” A murmur of approval travelled around the bridge as Jim stood by the tactical station. “Now, we aren’t far from Starbase 683, which is where we’ll be headed. So, Mr. Chekov, lay in a new course for Starbase 683.” Kirk looked back at Spock, beaming, and Spock couldn’t help but give him a small smile in return.

“Course plotted and laid in Captain.” Chekov announced.

“Mr. Sulu, when could we expect to get there at warp 3?”

“At warp 3 we will be there in 4 hours.”

“Excellent. Warp 3 then, Mr. Sulu. No need to push it.”

They were still 3 hours from Starbase 683 when Nyota left her station and walked over to Spock. “Are you alright?” She took his face in her hands and he could tell that she was trying to read his emotions by looking intently at his eyes. This was not uncommon, and he was always surprised and dismayed by how much she could gather from the simple procedure. He had several times feared that he had perhaps allowed some form of meld to take place when she touched him like that. Of course, there was no telepathy involved, yet she could almost always glean something that he would rather she not recognize. Perhaps he was more human than he cared to realize.

“I am in satisfactory condition,” Spock replied, trying to keep his face expressionless. While he was always pleased by Nyota’s touch, it was different this time, even in the early hours of Pon Farr he could feel the blood rising to his cheeks, as his body fought for the touch that it craved. “I appreciate your concern, though it is unnecessary. If you will excuse me, I have much work to do before we arrive at Starbase 683.” Nyota pulled her hands away; she seemed, however, not to have noticed his momentary lapse of control.

Spock realized too late as she returned to her station that she was hurt by his response, but he knew that it safer for her to be angry with him than to desire him right now. Just the thought of Uhura desiring him, wanting him inside of her, taking her as his own, over and over as his blood burned with the fires of Pon Farr… He tried to reign in his thoughts but Spock could feel his control slipping. _No. No, it’s too soon. It’s far too soon._ Spock braced himself against the wall of the bridge, the blood pounding in his ears, behind his eyes, and… _oh no. Oh no, not now. I cannot let this happen now,_ Spock’s prick began to swell, he could feel the blood rushing downwards as it quickly began to strain against the fabric of his trousers. Spock looked around the bridge wildly, his eyes blazing. No one seemed to have noticed his condition. Uhura was facing away from him, _no doubt as an attempt to make me feel remorse for having dismissed her._ Then his eyes settled on Jim. The Captain stood in the center of the bridge and was surveying the crew, clearly at a loss for things to do as they were so close to the starbase. When Jim’s eyes reached Spock the Vulcan’s response was explosive. Spock flushed bright green, his erection straining even harder against his uniform. He could feel his eyes glaze over and it took every ounce of his energy not to throw himself upon Jim; to tear him apart as he pounded into him. _No_. The wanton lust of Pon Farr was overwhelming; gasping for breath as he broke away from Jim’s gaze, Spock stumbled to the nearest door, forcing it open before the computer could even recognize his presence in front of it. He was standing in the captain’s Ready Room when the fires of Plak Tow consumed him.


	2. Chapter 2

Both Sulu and Chekov stood as Spock threw himself from the room, Uhura turned at the commotion behind her- just in time to see Spock as he tore at the doors and disappeared from the bridge.

“Stay where you are!” Kirk hoped they couldn’t hear the uncertainty in his voice as he tried to take control of the situation, “Sulu, Chekov, continue on course to starbase 683, Commander Spock has been feeling unwell all day, it is nothing to be concerned about.” Of course, everything that had just happened indicated that there was very good reason to be concerned, “I am going to go see how he’s doing-“

“Captain, may I-“ Uhura stood and took several steps toward the door before Jim held up his hand, “Lieutenant, I promise you it is nothing to worry about, Mr. Spock will be just fine and right now I need you on the bridge. Call that ensign back in here. I want her to personally handle all communications in preparation for docking at the starbase, do you think you can make sure she’s ready for that?”

Uhura wasn’t fooled but, pursing her lips, she nodded “Aye captain”. Jim examined the door before entering, he had never tried to force one of the doors, but he imagined that it would be quite difficult. The door itself showed no signs of abuse,  _ so he’s not quite the superhero he imagines himself _ .

Kirk allowed the doors to close behind him, making certain that none of the bridge crew had followed, before he looked into the room. He had barely turned around when Jim felt his body slammed against the door. Spock stood over him, pinning him to the door with one hand as Jim strained against his, indeed quite formidable, strength. “Spock, what are you doing?” he spat, the Vulcan’s face mere inches from his. He could feel Spock’s cool breath against his skin, and despite himself he could feel a not unfamiliar turn in his chest as he fought against the vulcan’s hold. “Spock, goddamnit it’s me.” He could see in Spock’s eyes that the vulcan was barely conscious of what was happening around him, “Damnit Spock if this is a mild symptom I’d hate to see you when you’re really in heat”. Then without warning, his first officer released him, stumbling back against the desk, horror evident on his face.

“Jim! I apologize. I… it has come on sooner than I’d expected.”  _ There are so many variables that cannot be accounted for,  _ Spock thought, _ perhaps my cycle will never be consistent with a full Vulcan’s Pon Farr. _ “I did not realise who you were…” It was a weak lie, even for Spock. Vulcans rarely lied and Jim would have to be an idiot to believe that when Spock had looked at him he didn’t recognize him. He forced himself to look away from Jim, his erection still throbbing as he tried to turn away from the captain, to hide himself.

“Spock,” Kirk’s voice once more stirred something unexpected in Spock, “I want you to tell me what you need.”  _ You. To rip your uniform off, to throw myself onto you, to take you until we both are emptied, _ Spock knew he didn’t have long, if he was going to send Kirk away, it would have to happen now.

“Captain, I must ask that you leave me, I am not safe to be around in this condition. It would be much better if you-“ Spock gasped for breath, his knees buckling as he fell to the ground. Kirk rushed over, swatting away Spock’s attempts to wave him back. 

Spock’s vision blurred, he could feel himself slipping in and out of consciousness as Kirk’s warm hand pressed against his forehead. His blood was on fire. Spock was only vaguely aware of what was happening. Jim’s hands on his face, his arms- Jim put Spock’s arm around his shoulder and helped him to the chair behind the desk. Spock tried to murmur a brief thank you, but he could not. Kirk brought him both food and water, which he was vaguely aware of throwing across the room as soon as it was presented to him.

When he finally came to, Kirk was sitting on the edge of the desk, anxiously watching Spock as he drifted in and out of consciousness. Spock raised his head weakly, “Lesek- Thank…” he tried to continue, but he could hardly find his own voice to speak. Kirk nodded and Spock saw again that same concern in his face. “Please, how far-“

Kirk shook his head, “it’s only been an hour since you left the bridge, we are still at least an hour away from Starbase 683. I can go out there and order an increase in our speed, but Spock…” Jim’s voice was serious once more, “What-” the captain faltered; clearly he was struggling with his own thoughts, “what happens if we’ve waited too long?”

Spock fought to keep his face unreadable, “In that event I will need to be securely confined to quarters and I would ask that you tell Lieutenant Uhura-”, without warning Kirk began to laugh, startling Spock whose eyes snapped open to look at the captain, “May I ask what it is about this situation that you find amusing?”

“I am just getting really tired of you leaving your dying wishes with me. You’re not gonna die, Spock. I won’t let you.”

“Captain, you may have no choice. I foolishly did not take into account my human mother when I was planning for Pon Farr, I do not know how my physiology will differ from others of my kind.”

“There are no others of your kind, Spock. Even if Vulcan had not been destroyed, you would still be the only one of your kind” Spock heard Jim’s words and frowned,  _ it is true that there are no other human-vulcan interspecies individuals, so the captain’s statement is true _ , but he could not help but feel that that was not what the captain had meant.

“Nevertheless, I don’t want you to discount the possibility that if I may not make it through the next fever. And even if I do, there are no guarantees that I will find a willing, suitable companion on the starbase.”

“What if you found a willing, suitable companion on board?” Kirk’s manner had changed entirely. His voice was quiet and low, deeper than usual, “What if you didn’t have to wait for our arrival at the Starbase?”

Spock looked at the human with curiosity, “I have already explained that that will not be possible.”

“Perhaps not with Uhura. She’s a Starfleet Officer, but she’s not trained in combat like some onboard. Perhaps if you found someone willing who was a bit more…sturdy. Would that take care of your problem?”

“If you are referring to a male partner,” again the stirring began in his blood,  _ not long now, I must get Jim to safety, _ “While it is an archaic belief that human females are incapable of physical prowess, it is true that there statistically more males who would be a nearer match for my physical strength.” Spock thought for a moment, he was still painfully aware of his erection, still just as persistent as before, “I see no reason why a male partner would be unsuitable, however, I neither wish to make my current condition known amongst the crew, nor do I expect many would be willing to take the risks that consent would entail.” Spock could feel his pulse throbbing in his temples now, “Captain, I must insist that you-“

“Spock, listen to me. As I see it- I have a good crew, and among that crew is a remarkable First Officer, who I don’t think would be easily replaced. I therefore consider it well within my duties to do anything and everything possible to keep him alive”.

Spock blinked, unsure at first what the captain was saying. He then sat straight up in the chair, his vision beginning to blur again at the edges, “No. Captain” He kept his voice firm, though he could feel the blood swelling once more, “I understand what you are trying to do and I appreciate the gesture, but I cannot put you in that position. More than just the risk, I would not want you to have to experience what I am sure would be unpleasant- as I would have no concern for your pleasure or comfort. If we were to do this, I would use you and then toss you aside when I had finished with you.”

“Is that a promise?” Jim’s lips curled into a smile.

“Honestly Jim, you are not understanding…”

“Honestly Spock,  _ you _ aren’t understanding. I can see that you’re slipping again. I know what you were thinking last time you were overcome by this… when you had me pinned against the door and I am telling you to go ahead. If all you need is someone to fuck, I am willing and suitable.”

Spock shook his head, trying to think logically, but his erection was throbbing once more. He wanted to bury himself in his captain and he could think of nothing else. It was not about physical attraction anymore, it was about the desperate need to claim another’s body. Kirk clearly wasn’t going to wait for Spock to try to dissuade him; no sooner had he finished speaking then he pulled his shirt off over his head. Spock needed no encouragement; the sight of Jim’s bare flesh reignited the fires of the Plak Tow. Spock stood quickly and before Jim could react Spock had circled to the front of the desk, pushing Kirk away from it and flinging him easily into the wall. Spock peeled his own shirt off; he, like other Vulcans, did not sweat, but he regulated heat less efficiently than others and the thought flicked briefly through his mind that removing his shirt was done more out of prudence than anything else. He put one hand square on the human’s warm chest once more, holding him in place as he leaned into him, his mouth crashing against the human’s neck.


	3. Chapter 3

Spock was vaguely aware of Jim’s sputtering, but he did not stop for a moment. He felt as the early Vulcans must have felt, before Surak and k'lalatar prnak'lirli. His cool breath and tongue mixed together on Jim’s hot throat and along his shoulder as he growled deeply, tasting the alien sweat and feeling the heart that he often found shockingly slow beginning to quicken its pace. 

Using his free hand he quickly stripped off his trousers and briefs. He felt Kirk writhing beneath him and saw that the human was making quick work of his own trousers. Spock was somewhat surprised to see that Jim was hard, his erection jutting out from his body, pressing against Spock’s own. Spock thrust his hips against the pinned-down human in a crash of bodies that drew audible gasps from both men. Spock’s thoughts flicked briefly to Nyota and how hurt she would be if she learned of this encounter, but the fire in his blood washed away the thoughts as Jim moaned softly into his shoulder.

Spock took a sudden step back, causing Jim’s eyes to flick open with concern. The Vulcan stood perfectly still as he looked his commanding officer up and down. His thoughts were no longer meticulously laid out in Federation English, instead all of the rarely used, illogically strung-together Vulcan thoughts swirled through his mind as his eyes lingered hungrily on Jim’s body. He was fascinated by the human’s anatomical similarities to his own, and he knew that it would not be long before he lost all ability to objectively observe Jim that way.

Jim watched him, concern evident in his eyes, and reached out a hand to touch Spock’s own. The touch ignited something within Spock that he had never felt before. The human’s fingers lightly brushing his own sent waves of pleasure, amplified by Pon Farr, up his arms and the blood once again began to pound within him. Normally he would have suppressed such a strong emotional reaction, but Pon Farr did not allow him that luxury. In that moment he had no desire but to possess Jim completely. Spock pulled the human to him, running his unusually sensitive fingers along the human’s chest as he leaned his forehead against Jim’s own. Spock was taken aback when Jim leaned into him and caught his lips in a passionate kiss. Spock had never experienced a kiss that was so consuming, he felt the other’s tongue flick past his lips and he again let out a low growl into his captain's mouth. Spock felt the captain’s hands slip off of his shoulders where they had been braced, and he almost came as he felt the captain’s hand grasp his length with a firm, resolute tug. His cock grew impossibly harder and, through the haze that had consumed his mind, he realised that he was biting the human’s lip. He noticed first the unusual taste, and drew his head back just enough to see the strange red blood pooling around the puncture. He lifted the human off of his feet and spun them around with an inhuman swiftness so that his own back was against the wall. He put Jim down and placed a hand firmly on the human’s shoulder as he pushed him to his knees. Kirk looked startled for a moment, but Spock could see again that same craving that he had seen earlier in the captain’s eyes as he looked directly at the swollen green-tinted cock in front of his face. Spock was aware of his actions seconds after they happened, vaguely aware as he pushed his anxious cock into the human’s mouth, impatient for the hot closeness of the human’s throat. His head fell back as he realised how close he was to the edge. Just as he was about to empty himself into Jim’s mouth the sound of Chekov’s voice from Kirk’s combadge filled the musky ready room.

“Captain, we have reached Starbase 683 and are prepared to begin docking.”

Jim’s face flushed bright red as he pulled his mouth off his first officer’s throbbing cock. “Um, Yes…” the feverous Spock was furious at the disruption, and as Jim spoke he tried several times to reoccupy the human’s mouth, “Initiate docking sequence without me, and feel free to take your leave when we arrive. I am still… seeing to Mr Spock. I will send out shore leave specifics to the crew by the end of the evening. Kirk out.”

Spock succeeded in his attempts just as Jim pressed his combadge to deactivate it. He thrust into the human’s mouth, allowing Jim no time to do any more than swallow the Vulcan length over and over. He could vaguely feel the human’s tongue massaging the underside of his cock as Jim’s eyes flicked up to look at the Vulcan, his mouth completely stuffed with the throbbing cock of his first officer. It was only moments before Spock was falling over the edge, his seed shooting down the Captain’s throat. Jim began to slowly lick along the length of the Vulcan cock, swallowing the last of his cum as he sat back on his heels, expecting that Spock would now be satisfied.

The glaze over Spock’s eyes lifted quickly and he was once again fighting the urge to fuck the human to shreds. Instead Spock pushed him backwards onto the ground and fell onto him, his movements precise as always, despite the fumbling franticness brought on by Pon Farr. He took his own cock in his hand and, allowing its natural lubricant to spread down its length, positioned himself on top of Jim. The surprise was evident on Jim’s face and he had only a few moments to try to relax before the Vulcan was pushing against the entrance to the the human’s tight body. Jim pushed him back and quickly spit on his own fingers, trying to open himself up as much as possible. Spock watched impatiently for several moments, before once more lining up to push his length into the human. Jim tried to keep from crying out, but as Spock repositioned himself he could feel the Vulcan’s cock throbbing inside of him and he let out a deep moan. This sent Spock over the edge. Spock thrust savagely into the human, all of his thought bent on claiming every inch of the gorgeous creature beneath him. 

Spock felt his cock sliding in and out, the relative coolness of his own body making the human once again seem like a pool of fire, he thrust in and out of the human, his eyes open, but unfocused as he came again and again inside the human, filling him to overflowing. Spock was vaguely aware of kirk’s breathing as he came once more, his seed spilling over, chilling the human’s warm body. Resolutely, he stilled himself, though the fires demanded that he continue to pound into Jim, splayed out beneath him. He shifted his weight without leaving the tight salvation of his captain’s body and used one hand to find the human’s meld points. 

Under normal circumstances he would never meld with Jim Kirk, and certainly not without first consulting the captain, but as soon as he moved his hand to the human’s face he felt Jim’s understanding and familiarity, _he has melded before…_ His body did not allow his thoughts to linger on this as he began once more to thrust into the human, this time feeling the pleasure both of his own penetration and the feeling of being penetrated. He adjusted his angle once more and with the next thrust he was distantly aware that both he and Jim were crying out. The human’s hand flew to his own rose-flushed erection and began tugging vigorously as Spock felt his body begin to contract. Spock again thrust into the human, his cock hitting just the right spot as they both came. Spock’s glassy eyes focused as he watched the human’s milky white cum squirt across Jim’s chest and abdomen, his fist pumping furiously to squeeze every drop out of himself.

It must have been at least another hour before the Pon Farr eased and allowed Spock to rest, collapsing on top of Jim without any warning. Jim tried in vain at first to lift the unconscious Vulcan off of him. He finally ended up unceremoniously wriggling his way out from under Spock’s heavy body. His body was sore and raw as he assessed his condition. He felt gingerly at a rib he imagined was probably cracked from being tossed into the wall or onto the floor at some point. He could taste blood in his mouth; unsurprised he ran his hand over his lips, feeling the distinct wounds where the Vulcan had bitten him, and over his neck and shoulders just to be certain. He smiled to himself as he felt a twinge in the wrist that Bones had just fixed up for him. Overall he was pleased with his condition and as he assessed the unconscious Vulcan, he wondered what he should do with his First Officer.


	4. Chapter 4

Kirk stood as quickly as he could in his current condition and regarded the unconscious Vulcan with a mixture of concern and bewilderment. If someone had told Jim Kirk that he would spend his evening being roughly and thoroughly fucked by his Vulcan crewmate he would have not only laughed his ass off, but probably thrown a punch at the person who had suggested it. Not that he wasn’t attracted to Spock, hell, he’d never have volunteered himself if he wasn’t attracted to the man, but he would never have thought that his first officer would be willing, under any circumstances, to have such an illogical encounter.

He looked back at Spock, still lying naked on the floor of his ready room. He wondered what would happen to the two of them now. Would Spock write the whole experience off as a biological imperative,  _ probably, he’s never willing to admit that he simply wants something. _ Would he be ashamed? Would he demand some sort of distance be placed between the two?

_ What if he leaves the ship? _ Kirk’s mind was racing, he could think of nothing worse than his First Officer leaving the ship. It was not as if Jim was helplessly in love with the Vulcan or anything, but he could not help but remember the love and familiarity that he felt in the other Spock’s- the older Spock’s mind. He had told Jim that he and Spock would have a long and fruitful friendship that he did not want to deprive either of them of. Kirk hadn’t been able to look at the Vulcan since taking him on as first officer without wondering what kind of relationship the other Spock had had with… the other Jim…. Of course, now there is no other Jim, there was only the man standing naked in his ready room, bruised and aching.

It was several minutes before Spock stirred, pulling Jim away from his thoughts. The captain had considered getting dressed and leaving Spock to clean himself up, but he didn’t want to leave his first officer in such an embarrassing situation, he figured it was better if he was there to reassure him that it would not compromise their relationship as Starfleet officers.

Spock sat up cautiously and Jim had to stifle a laugh at the sight of such an unkempt Vulcan. Spock’s hair was a complete mess, Jim tried to remember if he had been pulling it at any point, but he couldn’t recall,  _ it had gone on so long _ . Jim forced himself to look away as his first officer assessed the situation.

Jim could hear Spock shifting about behind him and quietly muttering, “Ni’droi’ik nar-tor, Ni’droi’ik nar-tor” over and over. Curious, Jim turned slightly to see what Spock was doing. His heart dropped when he saw his first officer, his face covered by his hands, knees drawn to his chest as he sat naked on the floor muttering and crying to himself. Spock looked so piteously human that, in that moment, Kirk was unsure what to do. He cautiously gathered up the science officer’s uniform and brought it to him, crouching beside him as he gently touched the Vulcan’s bare shoulder. “Spock?”

Spock shot upright, his face greener than Jim had ever seen it, his breathing rapid. startled, Jim stood quickly, wincing, and took a surprised step back as Spock stood in front of him. The two regarded one another in silence for almost a minute before Spock, still not looking his captain in the eyes, spoke, “I… I am sorry Captain. As I am sure a simple apology will not be sufficient, I hereby tender my resignation. I have not only acted in a completely inappropriate manner, but-“ his dark eyes flicked over the bruises that were already forming over Jim’s broken rib, “I have attacked my captain and am clearly no longer fit for duty.” To Spock’s surprise, Jim chuckled slightly. Spock raised an eyebrow,  _ clearly I have missed some subtle nuance which has caused the captain to misunderstand my meaning, _ “Captain?”

“You’re not resigning Spock. If you’re worried that you attacked me, you might recall one of the first times we were on the bridge together when you nearly choked me to death! I think biting my lip is hardly call for you to resign.” Spock’s eyes flew up to his face to assess the state of his lips and Jim caught his gaze for the first time since Spock had regained consciousness. “Spock,” Jim’s voice had softened, “I don’t want you to be ashamed of what happened. I understood what I was getting into and I would do anything to keep my first officer alive-” he faltered, "to keep  _ you _ alive."

Spock regarded him with a cautious gentleness, “I believe, Captain, that as First Officer, it is my duty to keep you alive.”

A broad smile crossed Jim’s face and he put his hand on the Vulcan’s shoulder, “See, that’s what I mean, there’s nothing to worry about.” Then, on a wild impulse, the human reached forward- taking Spock’s face in his hands and kissed him softly on the lips.

Spock’s body became like ice, and Jim pulled quickly away, his eyes filled with remorse.

“I’m sorry Spock. That was out of line.” He bit his lip nervously and shifted his weight slightly. “I… um… Should we get dressed?”

Spock looked wholly uncertain. His eyes darted around the room. “I believe that our encounter has been sufficient, though I am unable to say that conclusively.”

Kirk froze, “You mean after all of that there’s still a chance that you may die?”

“I am unsure, Captain. I must wait out the next few hours. If I experience a… resurgence, I will need to seek a similar engagement again. As I said before, I cannot be certain of anything because there are so many unique variables.”

Kirk looked at his first officer as he realised that he had never seen the Vulcan so helpless. “Alright Spock,” he declared, “we’ll stay here.”

Spock looked incredulously at the human, “You cannot be serious captain? We have reached the starbase, I am, therefore, able to search for another mate and you are in no physical condition to endure another round.”

Jim laughed out loud, “You think that’s the worst pounding I’ve ever taken?” He felt that stirring in his stomach once more, “I’ve been fucked harder and longer than that, believe me. That was nothing. Sure, I’m a bit sore, been awhile since I’ve been on the receiving end, but you aren’t gonna scare me off so easily.”

Spock could not tell how much of what Jim had said was the truth. He knew that the captain would never back down from a fight, no matter how improbable his chances of victory were, he had proved that a number of times already. Spock was about to disregard the captain’s boasting and slip his uniform back on when the room began to spin around him. “Jim-“ he barely managed to gasp the word before his legs gave out from under him.

When Spock regained consciousness Jim was once more kneeling at his side. He turned his head toward his captain’s body and suddenly remembered something, “The meld. You have experienced that before… Did I...did he-? ”

Jim shushed him, but nodded almost imperceptibly. “Don’t worry about him, Spock, And don’t worry about me. I just want to be certain that you’re gonna be okay.” Spock eyes closed and he smiled, his delirious state allowing the display of emotion to remain on his face. Jim laughed at the sight and unconsciously put his hand on the vulcan’s thigh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter is my fav.  
> Thanks for reading, let me know what you think!


	5. Chapter 5

The Vulcan's eyes opened slowly. The unanticipated touch of the human had brought him to the conclusive realization that while the Plak Tow had abated for a time, it was not gone. His blood began to churn once more, as he met Jim’s gaze, this time he saw Jim’s arousal clearly, both in his eyes and in the once again swelling cock that pushed Spock over the edge. He took the human by his shoulder and pulled Jim on top of himself. The human grunted, but the fires were consuming Spock more rapidly this time, he needed the feeling of that tight salvation once more. Spock pulled the human’s head down against his heaving chest as he thrust wildly against the body on top of him. Kirk tried to move his head, perhaps to reposition his body, but he could not fight Spock’s strength.

Spock let his other hand work its way down the human’s back before he allowed several of his fingers to slip into the human’s tight tunnel. Jim gasped and bucked against Spock’s body but the Vulcan held him fast, working his fingers inside of the human, “oh fuck, oh fuck- yes, Spock, oh fuck, I’m gonna-“ Spock let his fingers brush the human’s prostate once more and Jim was shouting, he could feel the human’s hot seed shooting across his chest as Jim slumped against him. He removed his fingers and rolled the human to the ground beside him. Using the same fingers he scooped up as much of the cum as he could and spread it over his own cock, slicking it much more than it had been before.

Jim moaned quietly at the sight of his own cum covering the greenish, throbbing cock. Spock stood quickly and lifted Jim up. He laid the captain with his back on the desk as he positioned himself to once more to drive into the human.

This time Jim was ready, he allowed himself to relax, knowing what was to come. Spock once again pushed himself in all at once, his cock filling the human’s body, cool and hard as he braced himself on the table, muttering in Vulcan as he began to pound into the human. Jim let his head fall back, off the edge of the table and his heart nearly stopped. From his upside-down view of the ready room he was looking directly at Lieutenant Uhura, who stood frozen in the doorway. The bridge behind her was dark, framing her body as it loomed like a ghost before him. Jim quickly lifted his head to look at Spock who was still moaning with pleasure as he rocked in and out of his human sheath. Kirk saw the Vulcan look up and he felt an almost imperceptible falter in his otherwise even thrusts, but the vulcan’s eyes remained glassy and full of lust as he continued pounding into the captain’s body.

Spock was looking directly at Uhura, though Jim was almost certain that he could not actually see her, when he took Jim’s cock in one hand and began pumping it while the other hand flew to the captain’s meld points. Jim tilted his head back once more and looked helplessly at Uhura before Spock’s mind met his own, the lust and fever drowning out all of his concern as they both came, shouting shamelessly before Spock collapsed once more onto Jim. When the captain was able to open his eyes again he hurriedly looked behind him, but Uhura was gone.

The vulcan pulled himself out of Jim’s warm body and collapsed into the nearby chair, allowing his limbs to drape over the armrests as if he had become liquid. Spock closed his eyes and was hit by the sharp realization of what he must look like. He pulled himself to an upright position and, his eyes still closed, began a simple meditation, trying to realign his thoughts.

“Spock?” Jim’s voice tugged at him from far away. Ignoring him, Spock once again sunk into a clear haze of thought. Everything on the ship, everything in that room had blown away into nothingness. A fog had rolled into his mind, but Spock was uncertain how to clear it, and Jim’s persistence in repeating his name was not making it any easier.

“Spock!” The vulcan’s eyes snapped open in a flash of anger. The expression was gone almost as soon as it had crossed his face, but the emotion had been conveyed. Jim looked for a moment as though he had forgotten what it is he wanted to say. The moment passed equally quickly, however and when the captain spoke his voice was cautious and measured. “Spock, how much of that last encounter do you remember?”

Spock’s mind raced as he imagined all of the horrible things he might’ve done to Jim as he frantically tried to piece together the vague memories of the last Plak Tow.

“I,” Spock seemed hesitant, vulnerable when he spoke, “remember being on the floor, I remember making you…” He looked down at his own chest, Jim’s semen still splattered there. He faltered, before skipping ahead, “I remember having you on the table, I remember the meld, you were… afraid” He said these last words as a realization. “Did I injure you?”

“No Spock, It’s just… You don’t remember anyone else in the room?” Jim was scrutinizing his face, no doubt uncertain whether or not to reveal whatever information he was trying to force Spock to recall.

“There was another person in the room?” Spock froze; he closed his eyes and tried to remember what had occurred.

_I slicked my own cock with Jim’s cum, I could hear his breathing quicken and I burned for him once more. I lifted him and carried him to the desk where I laid him down and prepared to enter him…_

Spock tried hard to remember every detail, without remembering how incredible it had felt, he could already feel his cock twitching at the memory.

_I pushed into him hard and began to rock forward, slowly at first, but gathering speed. I could feel his tight walls around me and his muscles contracting as I pushed in deeper with each thrust. I could hear him moaning and feel his pulse racing as I took him over and over again. But he stopped responding… Why did he stop responding? I discovered the cause of his distraction and then I took his mind as well to pull him back into me before we both went over the edge._

The missing part hit Spock like a le-matya plowing into him.

 _Nyota_!

He turned to Jim, not bothering to hide the shock on his face. “I trust I did not acknowledge her?”

Jim shook his head, but then hesitated, “You… you looked right at her, Spock. I don’t think you could see her, but I’m not sure if she could tell or not…”

Spock looked mortified, “Did I address her in any way?”

Jim wanted to give Spock a hug, “You looked her in the eyes… and began stroking me and continued to stare at her while you initiated the meld… I don’t know what happened after that. When we had both come she was gone…”


	6. Chapter 6

Spock was silent for several minutes, for a moment Jim worried that he wouldn’t speak again. Finally, “Computer, what is the current location of Lieutenant Uhura?”

“Lieutenant Uhura is in her quarters.”

“I must go speak with her. I will explain that it was not as it appeared and I will ask her forgiveness.” Spock stood resolutely and quickly began to dress. He was shaky on his feet, how much of that was the fever and how much was pure exhaustion Jim could not tell. Spock began to stagger toward the door, putting his hand against the wall as he tried to support himself.

Jim hurried over, “Spock, stop it. You’re exhausted and I don’t think the fever is entirely gone. You can’t talk to Uhura now, Spock she’ll kill you!” The captain watched helplessly as Spock once more began to move cautiously toward the door. Jim saw his knees buckle and hurried to his side as for the third time that day Spock fell to the ground. “Spock, you are in absolutely no condition to do anything besides rest. I will walk you to your quarters and I’ll go speak to Lieutenant Uhura.” Jim regretted the words as soon as he had spoken them, but when he saw the gratitude in Spock’s eyes he decided it would be worth it if he could get his first officer to get some sleep. Neither of them had any salvageable clothing left, but Jim always kept spare uniforms in his Ready Room.  _Always better to be prepared._

With Spock safely deposited in his room, Jim turned back to the turbolift to go to Lieutenant Uhura’s quarters to try to explain what she had seen. He considered swinging by his quarters and showering, certain he reeked of sex, but decided it was more important that he speak to Uhura as soon as possible.

The captain had chimed three times before he finally heard Lieutenant Uhura inside her quarters. “Spock, you had better have a damn good explanation for what I just saw- oh.” She stopped short when she saw Jim standing in the doorway, “You.” There was venom in her voice as she advanced toward him, “get out.”

“Lieutenant-“ Jim stood resolutely in the doorway, knowing that he would not get back in if he took a step back, “I need to explain. Spock wanted me to explain.”

“If Spock is going to explain anything to me he is going to do it himself and you are going to stay out of it!”

“Lieutenant!” the captain’s voice was stern as he took a step toward Uhura. “I know that this is a horrible situation. You have every right to be angry and confused, but I am still your captain and I am here to tell you that you misunderstood what you saw back there.” He looked at Nyota’s face, trying to catch any change in expression from the pure malice that she wore.

“I’m sorry, captain,” she emphasised the word with the most sarcasm and spite he had ever heard, even from her, “can you please explain how I misunderstood my partner having unprotected sex with his superior officer while on duty?”

Jim faltered, _this is going to be significantly harder than I was prepared for_. “Look, that is what it looked like, hell- that’s what it was. What you misunderstood was the meaning behind it.”

Nyota laughed out loud, “Oh I see, it didn’t mean anything to you? It just happened, I shouldn’t be worried because Spock’s feelings for me haven’t changed?”

“No! Look- Spock was… going through some things, and he needed someone to help him out…” Jim realized as he spoke that he hadn’t actually gotten Spock’s permission to explain Pon Farr to anyone else “I… I’m not sure how much I can tell you actually… It’s a Vulcan thing that he didn’t want anyone else to know about…” Jim looked up at Nyota, she no longer looked livid, now she just looked confused, and on the verge of tears.

“So what you’re telling me is that you’ve come here to reassure me that you were just helping Spock out with a ‘Vulcan Thing’ that you can’t talk about but the sex was nothing for me to worry about?”

“Um… Kind of. Look- Spock’s back in his quarters. I’m gonna go ask him if I can tell you everything and then I’ll come right back. Just- trust me, he wasn’t himself.”

“Look, Captain, I appreciate your concern for my well-being, really, I do. It’s so nice to know that after you’ve had a good fuck with Spock you can still be so objective about my feelings.” Kirk tried to interject but Nyota was not going to let him off that easily, “You know what your problem is, Captain? You think that everything on this ship is yours; you think that everyone owes you something. Well, guess what? I don’t owe you anything, and I certainly don’t owe you Spock. I don’t know what was going through his mind, or yours, if anything was at all, but I’m not going to sit around and wait for some immature back and forth explanation. Spock and I were clear when we entered into our relationship that this sort of behavior would not be tolerated.”

“Lieutenant!” Jim barked, even though he knew it would just anger her more, “I deserve all of that, but you are jumping to conclusions! Logical conclusions, I’ll grant you that, but they are still false conclusions! Spock had sex with me because he didn’t want to put you in danger. He-“

Nyota shook her head and stepped back through the door, her hand on the wall panel just inside, “I don’t know what sort of danger he was sparing me from, you can tell Spock that if he wants to try to justify himself he can come speak to me, just like he should’ve done as soon as this ‘vulcan thing’ arose. If you’ll excuse me, Captain,” this was the first time that word hadn’t been sharp and sarcastic, her whole voice had become quite soft, melancholy, “I am going to go down to the base to try to make the most of some very well-deserved time off.” Without another word she closed the door, leaving Jim standing in the middle of the corridor, at a complete loss.


	7. Chapter 7

As Spock lay on his bunk the last thing on his mind was the conversation taking place in Nyota’s quarters. He was a young Vulcan, one of the few remaining, he had known that the time would come soon for him to experience Pon Farr, yet he had not been adequately prepared for what it entailed. He had expected, perhaps foolishly, only the fever and the physical lust. He had not anticipated the primal emotions that had accompanied his wanton desire. He was certain that the desire for the captain was no more than a side effect of Pon Farr, it would be illogical to assume that my feelings for the captain are as a result of anything other than the Plak Tow. Spock shifted on the bunk, an unsettling thought crossing his mind,  _ it is also logical to assume that the Plak Tow would awaken already-present feelings that have been kept dormant. _

Spock attempted to assess his physical condition. His legs were still shaky, part of the severe feverish symptoms he’d expected- he’d witnessed other crew members in similar conditions being brought to sickbay where Doctor McCoy would treat them. Often they would be fit to return to duty that same day under the Doctor’s skilled practice. He knew that chances were slim that the doctor would still be on the ship, they had, after all, been at the starbase for nearly an hour now. The Vulcan continued to assess his state. His vision still blurred slightly when he shifted his gaze, but it had begun to correct itself once he stilled his focus. There was a slight ringing in his ears; no doubt it would dissipate once the Plak Tow had passed.

He decided he was in good enough condition to try to sit upright on his bunk. At first the sudden movement brought the twinge of a headache, but as he deliberately slowed down his motions, taking care to move with precision and caution, he found himself able to sit on the bunk, even carefully lowering his legs off the side. He became vaguely aware that an emotion was stirring in his mind; he took a deep breath, holding it until a short dizzy spell had passed, and tried to push the unwanted emotion from his consciousness.

Spock furrowed his eyebrows for a moment. Without warning he found himself suddenly experiencing an overwhelming longing, a very different feeling than the primal need he’d felt earlier. This was a gnawing feeling that something was incomplete, as if he’d been unable to complete a task assigned to him. Spock braced himself on the wall as he stood slowly, once again being careful not to push his body past its current limit. Walking slowly across his quarters he tried to assess what it was that he felt was missing. _ It is not sustenance, nor is it fluids, I have been diligent, despite today’s events in maintaining my health, so it is not a lack of nutrients.  _ Spock tried to imagine explaining the feeling to the doctor, an illogical exercise, as he could not predict with any accuracy what the doctor would say in this particular situation.

He wondered briefly what the captain would say. The Vulcan gasped aloud as that feeling of longing came rushing back. _ It was not until I thought of the captain, until I pictured him in my mind that I felt the resurgence of this emotion. I must therefore assume that this emotional response is triggered by the effect the captain has on me.  _ Spock crossed to the doorway, allowing it to open as he stepped out into the deserted corridor. Still engrossed in his thoughts, Spock made his way to the nearest turbolift.

***

Jim Kirk was at a loss for words, he had no idea how to relay his interaction with Lieutenant Uhura to Spock without upsetting him, perhaps even angering him. Any other time he would be glad for the half-vulcan’s stubborn refusal to address his human emotions, but in the grips of Pon Farr he seemed to loose all emotional inhibitions, so that small comfort was no help at this point.

He stepped out of the turbolift and onto the deck just outside of Spock’s quarters. He chimed the door, waiting patiently for some sign that it was alright, and frankly safe, to enter. After several moments had passed he went ahead and overrode the door, his mind racing as he worried what state Spock might be in on the other side of that door.

Jim stepped slowly into the room, the light was dim and he couldn’t tell from the doorway whether Spock was in his bunk or not. Jim moved cautiously, but he felt no fear, instead he was concerned, something wasn’t right,  _ I have to make sure Spock is okay! _ Once close enough to see Spock’s bunk he realized with a sinking feeling that it was empty. Without a thought he whirled around, wincing once more as pain shot through his ribs, his back and his tender hole. “Computer, where is Commander Spock?”

The silence in response was unnerving. “Computer, who is still on board?” Surely there would be some stragglers, maybe in engineering. Once more there was no response from the Enterprise’s computer. “Uhura must have gone ahead and initiated the leave sequence- all we’ve got is air and doors.” He said the words out loud to the deafeningly empty room.  _ And turbolifts! _ Kirk hurried back out into the hall, if he stopped at the bridge first he could reinstate some of the computer functions that had been temporarily disabled and then use those to find Spock.

This gnawing feeling in his gut, a deep concern for Spock that went past what he was used to feeling for his crew, was unsettling to the captain. _ Chances are good that he’s either recovered fully or he’s left the ship to try to find someone else to… finish him off… so to speak. There’s probably no reason at all to worry!  _ He made his way down the corridor to the turbolift once more.

“Main Bridge” he instructed, still at a loss as he tried to pinpoint this feeling.


	8. Chapter 8

Spock turned, surprised, when Jim strode off the turbolift onto the bridge. Their eyes met across the room and he watched the captain’s face register shock and then amusement. Spock was sitting, rather unceremoniously, in the captain’s chair.

“Out of the chair,” Kirk smiled as he teased the obviously weakened Vulcan.

“I apologize for my appearance, as well as for my behaviour, Captain. I have no doubt you will find some appropriate disciplinary action to take against me.” Spock’s voice was heavy, his words sounded tired, and he did not move from the chair.

“Commander!” Jim’s voice took on a mocking tone, “Are you asking me to discipline you?”

Spock’s gaze snapped up to meet Jim’s and the captain immediately regretted speaking. _I have no idea how to act around him now,_ Jim realized. _I must be making him so uncomfortable!_

“You are not making me feel uncomfortable captain, I was simply not anticipating your ability to turn my statement into sexual innuendo.”

They both felt the shift in the room, Jim slowly looked up at his first officer, his expression incredulous. Spock’s eyebrow slowly raised as he broke eye contact with the human.

“Spock?” Jim kept his voice level, “Did you just read my mind?”

“It would seem that that is what just occurred.” Spock’s voice was also measured, though he seemed somehow at a loss.

“Can you always read my mind?” Jim tried to keep any hints of panic out of his voice, a sizable task considering the implications involved. _If Spock can read my mind-_ Jim tried not to think of the ethical dilemma he might be facing.

“No, Captain!” Spock’s voice was on edge, he shook his head, still looking away from Jim’s face. “I have never before experienced a telepathic connection outside of a meld.”

Jim searched the vulcan’s usually unreadable face. This time, however, Spock’s face was tired, _exhausted even._ He looked confused, his eyebrow remained up as his eyes quivered slightly, a sign Jim had come to recognize meant he was thinking very hard about something.

 _Never before. Perhaps…_ Kirk froze, an unfamiliar presence inside his own thoughts, _But he is human. Though it is not impossible, perhaps that is what my counterpart…_ the captain took a step back, his mind was racing, it felt like it was being lightly tugged on. He felt concern and shock, but the emotions seemed divorced from his own thoughts, similar to the feeling of being in a meld, but deeper. He tried hard to focus on the sensation, to try to isolate it. The more he tried to focus his thoughts, the more frustrated he became, inordinately frustrated.

“Damn it Spock! What the hell is going on?” He heard his tone of voice rise, but he was unsure why. The anger that he felt seemed uncharacteristic, even to himself.

Spock looked up into the captain’s eyes, his mouth open slightly. He could feel the human’s anger, perhaps just another human emotional indulgence, yet he also sensed confusion and fear. Each of these on their own could be explained as a response to the unusual telepathic activity between the pair, yet all three together suggested something else to Spock, something he had not even considered, something he was certain he was not ready for.

“Captain, I must ask you to try to control your emotions, as we both seem to be experiencing unusual emotional turmoil. ” Jim’s eyes flashed as he glared as Spock. The captain took another step back, looking as though he was about to speak when his knees began to buckle. Spock moved effortlessly to his side, despite his own weakness, catching Jim easily in his arms. Even in this brief moment he could see the sweat on Jim’s brow, feel his elevated body temperature. “Captain, I believe I have the explanation for our unusual telepathic link, as well as for your physical symptoms.” Spock helped Jim over to the captain’s chair and took several steps back before speaking again, “You have been my mate during my Pon Farr. I am eternally in your debt, for I am almost certain that my neurochemical imbalance has begun correcting itself.”

Jim was trying as hard as he could to listen to Spock, but he found that infinite things were distracting him. Between the thoughts in his own mind and the thoughts that leaked from the vulcan’s mind he was having trouble keeping straight which thoughts were his. Not to mention the pounding headache that had appeared out of the blue. He could tell he wasn’t well- _no doubt I’ve pushed myself too hard on the last mission, and then in the events of the last several hours-_ his immune system was probably overloaded, he’d probably picked up a common bug that he’d have to get McCoy to take care of. _That isn’t it_ . The same thought kept creeping into his brain- whose it was he could not say, but he tried to suppress it as he continued forcing himself to listen to Spock’s voice. _That beautiful voice_.

“On Vulcan, before its destruction, I had a mate who had been chosen for me. We had been telepathically linked since our childhoods. She perished along with most of my people and that link was severed. As you know, the purpose of the Pon Farr is to find a mate. For Vulcans, the mate is not just a sexual partner, but a life partner to whom you are subsequently married. In rare instances, as with Vulcans who live off-world, a mate may be taken simply for a sexual encounter to resolve the Pon Farr, though it was not a common practice on Vulcan. “ Kirk shook his head vigorously, trying to physically clear his head. He saw Spock watching him carefully; the Vulcan paused, then he continued, with a strange look in his eye.

“Between certain individuals, occasionally a… bond… is established. This bond is incredibly rare, even between Vulcans, and as far as I know, unheard of when a Vulcan takes a non-vulcan mate.” Spock’s gaze softened as he looked at Kirk, who looked absolutely ridiculous. He was sweating and shaking, his eyes practically popping out of his head as he strained to focus on the Vulcan in front of him. Spock continued, knowing full well that the captain was probably only taking in bits and pieces of this information, he could feel some of the frantic thoughts as they crossed the bond into his own mind. “These bonded individuals grow to have a strong telepathic connection, as well as emotional and often physical connection. The closest human equivalent would be the concept of ‘soulmates’. Captain, I must insist that you understand that this bond is not intentional, while it may be the goal of a vulcan to bond with another, that bond is not established except in very rare cases when the individual’s minds were unusually compatible even before the meld.” He shook his head slowly, “when a non-vulcan becomes a part of the bond, they would begin their own cycle of Pon Farr- it would mimic the symptoms experienced by their Vulcan bondmate- perhaps their species would dictate certain changes in variables… such as your emotional overload. “

Kirk sat bolt upright in the chair- “Wait one minute… Spock,” he let the vulcan’s name slip out of his throat like a moan despite his efforts to control his speech, “When you melded with me earlier… are you saying we have to get married? Are you saying that I’m going through the Vulcan mating cycle?” His voice was on the verge of hysterical.

Spock quickly approached the captain, sinking to his knees beside him as a comforting gesture. “We do not have to marry, or do anything that you do not desire. I apologize deeply for what you are going through. It was never my intention to put you through this. I have felt an unusual emotional sensation in connection with you since I melded with you during my own Pon Farr. I know what you will need, what you may already need. Should you consent, I am willing to assist you in the same way you assisted me during my Pon Farr.”

Kirk looked down at the Vulcan below him, he could feel Spock’s remorse and concern, _so I suppose you can feel after all._ He looked at the vulcan’s face, his hair, usually so perfectly sculpted, still dishevelled from their earlier encounter. He felt that flutter once more in his chest, that strange attraction, he felt it deeper though this time- it was stronger than before. He no longer wanted to be with Spock, he wanted to never be without Spock.

 _I’m here Jim. Tell me what you need._ Jim gasped with pleasure at the presence of Spock in his mind, he felt him there, felt his desire. Kirk felt himself hardening at the sensation.

“I need you.” His voice cracked, it sounded so loud on the silent bridge. He looked down at the Vulcan who was gazing back at him, a look almost like respect in his eyes.

Spock nodded, almost imperceptibly as he shifted around so that he was kneeling in front of the captain. He carefully unfastened the front of Jim’s trousers, freeing his quickly hardening cock. He knew that the Captain was still in the very early stages of Pon Farr, he wanted to try to end the human’s misery before it became unbearable, as it inevitably would. Repositioning himself between the captain’s knees he took the pink cock in his hands. He slowly licked up the length of him, his precision and determination _so vulcan_. Each time he reached the head he’d stop abruptly, returning to the base to repeat the process. Kirk’s gasps were like a symphony and Spock, the skilled conductor, brought each one in rhythm, with carefully altered lengths and interspersed moans as his hand began to slowly work back and forth.

Kirk had never felt anything like this before. It was not only Spock’s surprising skill, but the emotions, the desires, everything that he was feeling combining to bring him absolute bliss- and absolute need. He’d never felt so satisfied, yet he’d never felt so desperate for more. As Spock’s tongue continued to massage his erection he let his head fall back, feeling both his own desire and Spock’s so keenly was an almost hallucinogenic sensation. Suddenly he cried out in pleasure, Spock’s whole mouth slipped over him, he could feel the Vulcan bobbing up and down, working the underside of his erection with his tongue.

Jim was shocked at how pleasant the slightly cooler mouth was. He had spoken with other cadets while at Starfleet who had slept with Vulcans but they had almost exclusively expressed distaste for the slightly cooler Vulcan body temperature. He let his hand find the vulcan’s head and he wove his fingers through the vulcan’s messy hair. He felt Spock falter for a moment and he looked down to see Spock’s eyes closed, his jaw, with Jim still in his mouth, had gone slack and a deep growl from the back of his throat sent amazing vibrations through Jim’s cock. _You cheeky bastard,_ _hair-pulling turns you on_! He let himself lightly tug on the vulcan’s hair once more, melting into the Captain’s chair as Spock redoubled his efforts, growling quietly as he swallowed Jim’s cock over and over again.

Jim could feel himself getting close, just as he was about to pull the Vulcan off of him he felt Spock’s thoughts in his mind again, _you will most likely have no refractory period, I would suggest we continue our present course of action and change positions afterward._

Kirk almost laughed out loud, “Are you saying you want me to come in your mouth Commander?”

Jim watched the Vulcan with fire in his eyes, Spock’s mouth was still filled with Jim’s throbbing cock as he met the captain’s gaze. _That is exactly what I am saying, Jim_.

The look in the vulcan’s eyes sent Jim over the edge, “Oh fuck, Spock! Oh God!” he emptied himself down the cool throat as the Vulcan continued to apply just the right amount of suction.

 

Spock felt the captain’s cum shoot down his throat, he eagerly swallowed several times and thirstily made certain he let none go to waste as he gently eased off the captain’s cock. He was pleased that his hypothesis had been correct as Kirk remained just as hard, Spock stood quickly, guessing correctly that the captain would want to change positions. Jim’s eyes were on him as he stood and he saw the captain’s lust grow stronger as he observed Spock’s own bulge, still inside his regulation trousers. Kirk stood quickly and roughly pushed Spock back. At first Spock wondered if he had done something unacceptable, but when the captain’s hands reached down to rub his erection through the fabric he realized that it was simply the Pon Farr progressing as rapidly in the captain as it had in him.


	9. Chapter 9

“I want you Spock. I want all of you.” Spock felt Jim unfasten his trousers and grab roughly at his erection. “I want this,” Kirk said, as he stroked his first officer to his full length. “I want this,” Kirk let his other hand slip up Spock’s shirt, rubbing it up and down his chest. “I want this,” Jim’s hand had released Spock’s erection and now it grabbed his ass through his trousers, using his grip to pull the Vulcan closer. As Kirk began to grind against him he continued his list, whispering, his breath hot on Spock’s neck. “I want this,” the hand that was still under Spock’s shirt found one of the vulcan’s nipples and pinched it hard. Spock gasped and tried to pull back but the Pon Farr was aiding Kirk’s strength, and he pulled the vulcan closer again. “I want this,” his hand found the other nipple, this time Spock bit his lip to keep from gasping and did not pull away. He felt his cock twitch with excitement at the sharp pain,  _ fascinating _ . “I want this,” Kirk grabbed one of Spock’s hands, the Vulcan moaned softly as the human took his fingers in his mouth.

Kirk sucked on one of the alien fingers, but when he saw Spock’s reaction he stopped, smiling mischievously. Kirk brought Spock’s hand to the vulcan’s own mouth, inserting each of the vulcan’s fingers, one at a time into Spock’s mouth, watching him moan shamelessly as he sucked on his own fingers, and feeling his resistance each time Jim would pull his fingers away.

_ Please Captain, I must insist that you cease this… teasing. _ Spock’s thought came while he still had one of his fingers in his mouth; his eyes were closed as he greedily sucked, feeling the erotic sensation travelling straight to his now aching cock.

Kirk said nothing, but he pulled against Spock’s resistance and brought his hand back down to his side, pinning both tightly against his narrow hips.

“Don’t move.” Though Kirk’s voice was commanding, the fire in his eyes betrayed his intentions as he circled the motionless Vulcan. Jim stripped off his shirt, watching Spock’s eyes follow his every move. “I know you want me, Vulcan.” Spock’s gaze lowered, submissive or ashamed, Kirk could not tell, and he did not care. All he wanted in that moment was to feel his body against Spock’s, to fill the Vulcan, to hear Spock cry out his name as he drove into him. Jim could feel the heat rising in his body, his cock ached and his face flushed. Any doubts that remained about Spock’s explanation that Jim was in Pon Farr vanished as he felt the powerful need to possess Spock. He looked at his first officer, unaware that he was gasping for breath, his whole body was shaking and he threw himself at the Vulcan, in a crash of bodies they slammed into Checkov’s station. Jim was ravenous, he had the Vulcan pinned beneath him, Spock’s body was bent backward as Kirk kissed him passionately. Then Jim flipped Spock over, the Vulcan offering little resistance as Jim held his chest down against the console. Leaning over his first officer’s back his mouth frantically explored the back of the Vulcan’s neck and up to his ears, Kirk paused to lick the vulcan’s ear all the way up to its pointed tip before he straightened himself up slightly and grabbed a fistful of the back of Spock’s uniform.

Spock cried out as the neckline of his uniform cut into his skin. Kirk’s strong grasp on the uniform lasted only a moment as he ripped the shirt off Spock’s body. The vulcan’s chest fell back onto the console with a thud and he tried very hard to resist his instinct to fight back.  _ The captain needs this, just as I, myself, needed it mere hours ago. _ He felt the captain’s palms on his back; they held him down as Kirk pressed his stiff organ against the back of Spock’s trousers. He knew that Spock had nothing underneath; he’d seen that much earlier. Spock waited, his cheek on the cool surface as the captain slowed down, taking his time as he slowly rocked his hips back and forth, rubbing his cock along the length of Spock’s cleft.

“Trousers.” He said it softly, but there was no question that it was an order. Spock, still pressed against the console, struggled to unfasten and slip out of his trousers, he felt himself grow impossibly harder as he felt Kirk’s skin against his own.

Kirk’s palms left his back, but Spock remained motionless, waiting for whatever was going to happen next.

“Stand up, Spock.” Jim’s voice was husky and thick. Spock allowed himself to feel across the bond, to feel his bondmate’s passion. He stood slowly, turning to face Jim as he sent his own thoughts across the link.

Jim’s mind seemed to fall away from his body, the sensation was dizziness with clarity. It was a total lack and complete grasp of focus. He felt another mind with his own. The other mind was foreign, alien. He could feel Spock’s desire, he stumbled back toward his chair as he saw,  _ though it was more like experiencing than seeing _ , Spock straddling him, lowering himself onto Jim until his full length was inside him, he felt the tightness around his cock, he felt Spock working his muscles to provide additional stimulation. He could feel Spock’s breath on his ear, whispering, “Jim, you are mine, and now I am yours. I want you to fill me. I want you to control me. I want you to fuck me.” Jim gasped, he felt himself coming inside of his first officer, felt the Vulcan rocking back and forth, his hands digging into Jim’s shoulders as he braced himself against the bucking captain.

Kirk gasped as he felt a hand on his shoulder, he was still standing, still aching, what he had seen, what he had felt, was what Spock wanted. Spock had projected his own desires into Kirk's mind, and Jim had felt every moment of it. Jim’s eyes were full of wonder as he looked at the beautiful creature before him who could literally fulfill his every fantasy. The heat again returned to Kirk’s body and he felt as though the blood in his veins was literally on fire. He grabbed his first officer and, planting a hand squarely on his bare back, pushed Spock’s body over the side of the chair. Using one hand to guide his cock in, he grabbed a fistful of the vulcan’s hair with the other, he pushed himself into the Vulcan, feeling the cool tightness close in around his entire cock as he began to roughly thrust in and out. Spock’s moans, mixed with the sounds of flesh against flesh, filled the bridge, the hot scent of sex hanging heavy around them as the captain pushed in deeper, harder. Feeling his balls constricting, Jim yanked roughly on the vulcan’s hair as he emptied himself into the cool hole. He felt Spock’s body relax, but Kirk was not yet free of the Pon Farr- he pulled out and pushed the Vulcan off the chair onto the floor. Spock seemed startled but Kirk put a hand over his mouth as he fell on top of him. Their bodies crashed to the ground, Kirk’s glazed over eyes saw only shapes, black and red and grey. He could hear the vulcan’s sharp breaths as he turned him onto his side. Jim positioned himself behind Spock and once again dipped into his body, this time he used one arm to pin the Vulcan to him, they rocked together as his other hand found the vulcan’s erection. “we’re gonna come together this time Spock,” Jim’s voice sounded distant in his ringing ears, yet he could hear every soft gasp and moan that his thrusts elicited. He wrapped his palm around the vulcan’s slick cock and began slowly stroking it. “I want you to say something, I want to hear you speak out loud.”

Spock hesitated, he rarely was verbal during sex, let alone now that there was no need for verbal communication,  _ but it is what the captain desires, though I do not know what I would say _ , his thoughts were hardly coherent as he felt the throbbing cock filling his body.

“Well come on, Spock. Do you like it?” Kirk’s voice had a sharp edge to it, Spock did not doubt that the captain would be willing to punish him if he gave him cause, while he did not usually enjoy submission as some humans did, he could not help but let out a small gasp when he felt Kirk’s arm wrapped around his chest pull him closer.

“I… do…” Spock’s voice quivered as he moaned the words, “I… want more...”

This drove Kirk over the edge, he felt the blood fever once more ignite as he adjusted his angle, hitting just the right spot as Spock gasped “Yes! Captain, please… do not stop!” he pumped Spock’s erection harder and faster as Spock pushed himself back with each thrust, forcing the captain deeper into his body. Kirk felt himself dangerously close to the edge, “Jim, I cannot- ah!” Spock’s words were lost as they both came, shouting one another’s names as their orgasms spiralled beyond their bodies and into their shared consciousness. Kirk felt Spock’s body releasing as Jim rolled onto his back, gasping for breath.


	10. Chapter 10

They lay that way for many minutes. Kirk’s body seemed to want to lose consciousness, but the presence of Spock’s mind kept him just on the edge of oblivion. He could sense neither the passage of time nor his surroundings, yet he knew that Spock was near, and that kept his mind at ease.

Finally, after almost an hour, Kirk’s weakened voice broke the silence.

“Is it over? Has it passed?”

He felt a cool hand on his forehead, and then on his cheek, he kept his eyes closed as Spock stirred beside him.

“The Pon Farr seems to have passed, it is logical that the blood fever would not continue as long for a human as it does a Vulcan. Their biological needs differ greatly.” Kirk was on the verge of tuning out the rest of the vulcan’s words when Spock continued, “As for your question, ‘is it over’, I must admit that I am curious about that myself. I am in a difficult situation with Nyota, and I doubt it will be one that we can resolve. Nor would I want to force a resolution when I have bonded with another.” Kirk let his eyes flutter open to see the Vulcan sitting beside him, still unclothed, his palms steepled in front of his abdomen. “I would like to know what your wishes are, as I anticipate a relationship between the two of us would cause quite a stir on the ship, and it is not something, bonded or not, that we should enter into lightly.”

Kirk sighed, “I was really hoping to avoid this talk.” He rolled carefully onto his side so that he was facing the Vulcan. “Spock, I know you. I know that you try to uphold as many Vulcan traditions as possible, but do you honestly think that we are compatible enough to even discuss a relationship?”

“I would submit that the last 8 hours indicate that we can indeed be very compatible as mates.”

“Yeah, Spock, but what about before then? When we’re out on a mission we almost never agree. You have repeatedly made it clear that you think I make illogical and unwise choices. What’s to stop you from worrying somewhere down the line that my decision to say yes right now is a mistake? That’s the most illogical thing I’ve ever heard, Spock!”

“With all due respect captain, you do not understand the significance of the Bond. I will not deny that we are often at odds with one another, yet in response to your question, yes. I must put all my uncertainties aside, to be bonded is not always to agree, or to always understand one another- It goes beyond any sense of understanding. It is about trust, it is about a congruence of minds. It is remarkably rare and I doubt any of those on Vulcan who had bonded with another even survived Nero’s attack.”

Spock was silent for nearly a minute. Kirk watched him in silence; he knew that his first officer had more to say- so he waited, lying beside him. “I need to speak with my… self. It is probable that he knew that we are T’hai’la, a fact which he should have shared with me immediately.” Spock was slowly shaking his head. Jim watched with curiosity as he lapsed into silence once more. When the Vulcan spoke again, his voice had changed, it had become more- intense, “In the meantime if, and only if, you find it acceptable, I would like to initiate another meld. I believe I can more efficiently explain to you the significance of the bond in that way. And-“ Spock faltered, he looked at the captain with a strange, almost fearful gleam in his dark eyes.

“And what Spock?” Jim’s body was tired, but his mind was still alert. He braced his hands on the floor to bring himself up to a seated position, once again wincing at the pain in that damn wrist that Bones had just fixed up.

“And… I also desire the meld because… as we are bonded… I crave your touch...”

Spock looked so ashamed that Kirk placed his hands squarely on the Vulcan’s shoulders, “Look Spock, I’m not gonna pretend that I understand what is happening, but we’ve been through a lot in the past few hours. Needing contact with another person isn’t shameful- it’s perfectly understandable. I-“ Jim hesitated, “have to admit that I feel the same way, since I went looking for your in your quarters I’ve felt this… I don’t know, it’s like something’s missing.” He shook his head as Spock opened his mouth to speak, “ Now, I don’t know if that something is you, but right now, I don’t feel anything missing.” The human looked at his hands resting on the vulcan’s shoulders, the subtle differences in their skin tone seemed more drastic than ever in the low light of the bridge. “That feeling, does it come from this bond thing?” His eyes met Spock’s, “Will I feel that every time I’m not with you?”

“We will learn to control many aspects of our bond. I am sure, as our jobs will not allow us to be in constant physical contact, that we will find another way to satisfy our needs as bondmates. So far as you are human you only crave physical touch, but Vulcans who have bonded desire primarily the touching of minds, the meld becomes a new sensation, unlike melding with anyone else. It becomes, more intimate.”

“More intimate than being inside my head?” Kirk laughed.

“I know that you have yet to fully understand the meld, let alone our new bond link. I… want to meld with you again, because I need to. I need to feel your whole mind again, more than has been established by the link.”

“I don’t know Spock, if it’s such an… intimate experience, maybe we should wait a little while. Don’t get me wrong, I could go another round, but are you sure you want to do this now? You need to talk to Uhura and we should both probably talk to Spock- er, the other Spock. Because you’re right- he probably knows more about this than we do. Maybe he could tell us how to break the bond?”

Spock’s eyes widened as he looked at the dishevelled human in front of him. Wordlessly he took both of Kirk’s wrists in his hands, removing the human’s hands from his shoulders.

Spock could see the surprise in Jim’s eyes. He lowered his gaze as he spoke softly, “Is that what you desire? To break the bond?”

“Aw, come on Spock!” Jim knew he’d made a mistake- his voice was full of remorse and he knew his mind must be as well, “You know I didn’t mean for that to come out like that. I just-“

“You do not think we are suitable mates.” Spock’s voice was level, calculated. All traces of emotion were gone from his face and his speech, “I apologize for my behavior. We agreed that you would help me through Pon Farr as my captain and friend, when the bond formed I illogically assumed that you would be willing to be my bondmate.”

“Spock! Shut up!” Kirk’s eyes had narrowed, his brow furrowed, as it always was when he was frustrated, “Look- You’re right I don’t understand the bonding process. I don’t know how logical it is or isn’t, I don’t know why we bonded or even how we bonded. But, I doubt this whole thing would work if I wasn’t interested!”

Spock’s eyebrow raised, he was clearly taken aback by the captain’s words so Jim continued, “I don’t want you to think that I don’t want to give it a shot- hell, I only suggested that we see if it could be broken because I figured you probably want to be stuck with someone better than me.”

“Better, Captain?”

“Yeah Spock, better. Smarter, or more disciplined, or more logical or something. We’re about as opposite as you can get without counting Klingons”

“I believe there is a human saying, ‘opposites attract’. Besides, I do not think that your assessment of your own characteristics is accurate. I find the two of us quite similar in many respects- and I believe that you have far more discipline, intellectual prowess and logic than you choose to recognize. On our first mission together did you not use all three of these skills to rescue commander Pike from Nero’s ship? Furthermore you showed compassion, a characteristic that many humans fail to adopt. Your statement that you think I would want someone better is logical, but incorrect. I do not know anyone who would fall into that category.”


	11. Chapter 11

Jim’s eyes were full of tears. He sniffed and turned away to hide his reaction to Spock’s words but strong fingers gently caught his face. Spock turned the human’s face back toward him slowly. Kirk saw the innocent, child-like fascination in the vulcan’s eyes as he looked at his bondmate.

“Humans are the only terran species who shed tears when expressing emotions.” Spock did not seem to be speaking to him, his voice was soft, as though he was speaking to himself, and his eyes were searching, filled with wonder. “Many believe that crying evolved as a signal. It allows only those closest to you to share in your emotion. It does not broadcast weakness or joy or strength, it keeps them close- so that only those who see and understand can share in the experience. I believe that tears are the most human thing in the universe.”

Jim watched Spock speak, for the first time since Spock had first come to him to ask for shore leave he really looked into the vulcan’s eyes. Jim realized that, though his first officer could be astoundingly arrogant, condescending, and cold, he could also be this, the awe-struck scientist- always seeking new knowledge, always piecing together the puzzle. Jim also realized that the Vulcan had been through a hell of a lot more in his life than he let on.

Jim leaned his face in slowly and, though initially his first officer looked surprised, Spock met him in the middle for what they would always consider their very first kiss.

They stayed that way, entangled in the darkness of the bridge for almost half an hour. When their lips finally parted both of them knew that there was no point trying to fight the bonding process. Kirk took one of Spock’s hands gently in his own and brought it slowly to his face. “You said earlier that you wanted to try to explain it to me. That this would be the best way. I want to understand. I want to know more about the bond.”

Spock nodded solemnly, positioning his fingers over the human’s meld points. The link they felt outside the meld was mostly an empathic one, especially on Jim’s end. Spock had found that he was able to focus it into a more telepathic energy, presumably because of his natural psionic abilities. Yet, with his fingers on the human’s meld points, before even initiating the connection, he found himself right beside Kirk’s mind. He could not necessarily reach in and grasp the thoughts and feelings there, but he could see them passing by- some in bits and pieces, others complete, he had never felt such a strong connection to any mind before.

“Our minds become one, we are one. My mind to your mind. Your thoughts to my thoughts.” Kirk never even heard Spock’s voice, the mantra focused the Vulcan’s energy and the meld became unwavering.

To an outsider they would have seemed like statues. Both men, naked, completely motionless with the vulcan’s firm grip on his human counterpart’s face. The stillness was broken momentarily when Spock brought his other hand to the human’s meld points as well, doubling the intensity of the meld that both participants felt.

Jim could not articulate what the meld felt like. It was so vastly unlike any human experience. All of the human’s emotions seemed meaningless, yet so did logic and thought. He felt only Spock. Not Spock’s body or Spock’s thoughts, but the very essence of his bondmate. They felt a void, nothing surrounding them, nothing separating them, nothing except the love of the other. Jim could see why Spock had been so eager to meld once more. The feeling of previous melds had always been chaotic. When they had melded during the vulcan’s Pon Farr there had been elements of what they felt now, but even then there was a goal, there was a purpose. Now they had no agenda, no needs except to feel one another. Jim could not percieve time passing. Only an instant had passed before Spock’s mind began to separate, cautiously.

Back on the bridge Jim was surprised to find that their link outside of the meld seemed to be stronger. Perhaps it’s just some sort of after-effect of the actual meld.

_ It is not, Captain. The meld intensifies the bond between bondmates, just as it creates the bond initially. Each time we meld, our telepathic bond will grow. It would be logical to assume that there is a limit, though I do not know what that would be. _

“So if we meld every day we’ll eventually be able to feel the effects of the meld when we’re apart?” Kirk’s voice sounded foreign to him, but the human was still unsure how to project his thoughts to the other, since Spock didn’t seem to pick up his every thought.

“I would estimate that any link would take many years to reach the intensity of a joining of minds. If you desire, we can attempt to test my hypothesis.”

“Sounds good Spock.” Jim smiled, “We should probably get off the ship, no doubt in the morning the dock crew will come on board to run diagnostics, and I wouldn’t be surprised if Scotty’s got some engineering crew coming in tomorrow too. He's probably thrilled that he's got some extra time to finish everything he’s been working on.”

“A reasonable assumption. However, I do believe that you told Ensign Chekov that you would send out shore leave specifics before the end of this evening. A deadline which is rapidly approaching.”

“I did?” Jim’s eyes widened, “When was that?”

A green flush washed across Spock's cheeks, “I believe it was during our… first encounter… I am willing to provide specifics of our actions at that time if you desire them.”

Jim laughed out loud- shifting onto his knees he stood and, wincing with each movement, pulled his uniform back on. “I don’t need the specifics Spock, I remember when I said it. Glad you remember that much though, I wasn’t sure you would. Now, I need to grab a few things here before we go back to quarters to get everything we need for the next few days.”

“Your inquiry was intended to force me to reveal how clear the memory of my Pon Farr was? That is a very sly manoeuvre. One that will not be forgotten.” Spock added as he too stood up and pulled his trousers back on. He tentatively lifted his ripped shirt and examined the material.

Jim turned and laughed when he saw the Vulcan standing by the pilot’s station, his eyebrow raised as he looked bewilderedly, at the ripped blue fabric. “Yeah sorry about that… I guess I got a little overenthusiastic.”

“I do not believe your enthusiasm was above normal parameters.”

Jim laughed again as they both walked once more into his ready room to gather his things.


	12. Chapter 12

When they stepped onto the starbase, Jim was struck by the stark contrast of the commotion on the base with the silent, abandoned ship. He took a moment to stand on the solid ground, he always did miss the faint vibrations and silent hum when he wasn’t onboard the Enterprise.  _ I can’t even imagine living any other life. _ He watched the shopkeepers and visiting dignitaries as they were headed to their homes or their lodgings,  _ they had built a life here, on the base-  _ seeing travelers and members of Starfleet coming and going,  _ probably most of these people had never left the starbase. _ He was watching a man arguing with a ferengi traveller, they were both animated in their movements, both repeatedly pointing at the bowl of food in the ferengi’s hand.

“Captain?”

Spock’s voice broke his disengaged stupor, he tore his gaze from the altercation and saw that he had begun lagging behind his first officer. “Sorry, Spock Just glad to be on leave.”

“Are we going somewhere in particular, Captain?” Spock continued to lead the way through the bustling roadways.

“I haven’t been to this starbase before, but usually most of the lodging is near the center of the base.” Kirk took a firm grip on Spock’s elbow and steered him down a side passage. “Come this way, I just saw a sign.”

Spock was shocked to feel a surge of arousal when the captain grabbed him. He tried quickly to suppress the feeling, but a quick glance from the human told him that his response had leaked across the bond. He walked quickly, guided by the captain as they made through a distinctly uninhabited area of the base. Feeling increasingly uneasy, Spock stopped abruptly when he saw the signs that Jim had been following, “Captain!”

Kirk stopped, looking back at his Vulcan companion, “what Spock?”

“Is this the sign that you are referring to?” Spock pointed at a sign, a little worn-looking vertical sign that listed directions to the center of the starbase.

“Yeah. What’s the matter Spock?”

“I am simply surprised, Captain. I was unaware that you could read Vulcan.”

Jim furrowed his brow, his eyes narrowing as he walked back to where Spock stood to take a second look at the sign. The swirling symbols, written vertically, were nothing like Federation Standard English. “I don’t-“ the human faltered and inclined his head, trying to understand what had happened, “I don’t know any Vulcan. I was pretty useless in most of my xenolinguistics classes, actually. I know a few phrases in Klingon and some basic Romulan, but I never even took Vulcan!” he looked at the sign again, “But I can read every word…”

Spock nodded solemnly, “It is probably something that you have achieved through our melds and maintained through our bond.”

Jim looked around, his mouth open in horror, “This was the Vulcan community on this base… That’s why there’s no one here. They’ve all relocated to try to-“

“To try to repopulate a Vulcan society. It is also possible that some of the Vulcans who had homes here spent time on our homeworld. It is likely that they were on Vulcan when the Narada attacked.”

Both men stood in silence for several minutes, looking at the homes and shops, small restaurants and meditation centers that were now empty, falling into disuse.

“Captain, may we continue?” Kirk couldn’t tell if Spock was being practical or if he simply could not stay in such a desperately sad place.

“Yeah... yeah, no you’re right, Spock. Let’s get going.”

The center of the base had lodgings on every corner, but Jim didn’t look twice at any of them once he saw the smallish building at the end of the road.  _ Xyrillian HoloHome _ . He had been fascinated by hologram technology since reading about it at the academy. They had learned that some Klingon battle cruisers had Holodecks, entire rooms that could simulate any location, and even include holographic beings. Spock had tried to argue with him that the price would most likely be exorbitant, but Jim had insisted and he was starting to notice that Spock had been more willing to compromise than before. _ Not a bad turn of events. _ When the two officers walked through the dingy doorway into the dark building they were amazed to find themselves in an enormous, marble room, with sparkling floors and crystal chandeliers hanging above an extravagant marble staircase. A xyrillian greeted them at the door, offering to take their belongings and show them to their rooms.

“If we may, it would be preferable if the two of us could share one room.” Spock’s voice echoed in the grand entryway. The Xyrillian nodded, he wore a variation on one of earth’s old space suits and Spock recalled that their species required a vastly different atmospheric makeup than that of the terran-simulating starbase.

Kirk was surprised that Spock had been so straightforward about wanting to share a room with him, especially since he had not yet spoken to Uhura. “Spock,” he said as they settled into their room, a gorgeous ancient Appalachian lodge room with dark pine and thick quilts on the bed, “you should meet up with Uhura. I know that you understand this bonding process, and I’m starting to understand it better myself, but you can’t leave her in the dark about all of this. She was very upset when I spoke to her before she left the ship. She wanted you to explain everything yourself, understandably.”

“Understandably indeed.” Spock agreed, “I will attempt to reach Nyota’s communicator. If she has it with her I will arrange a meeting between the three of us.”

“Oh no you don’t!” Jim punched Spock’s shoulder with a playful anger that drew a curious look from the Vulcan, “I’m not a part of this. You need to talk to her by yourself. I’m pretty sure I’m the last person she wants to see right now.” Kirk went to his bag and retrieved his communicator for Spock to use, “and Spock, try to be kind. I know that you don’t intend to seem unkind, but humans, especially in the state Nyota’s in right now, need some sort of compassion. Let her down easy.”

Spock nodded, taking the communicator, and left the room.


	13. Chapter 13

Their conversation on the communicator had been brief, but as Spock strode down the darkened street toward the coordinates that she’d provided he couldn’t help but adjust his uniform once more, running his palm over his hair in an attempt to look professional.

The coordinates were inside a complex of buildings. Reaching the building’s exterior, the Vulcan paused for a moment to regard with suspicion the faded walls and bright signs. The door opened and he stepped through. The entryway was dark and filled with a foul odor. Spock hurried down the corridor, past a multitude of different species, mostly sitting on the ground, some were cleaning weapons, some arguing, some sleeping against the wall. Spock could not imagine what Uhura was doing in such a place.

When he reached the final door on the left of the corridor, he buzzed his way through to find a smoky room with low ceilings. Inside there were large green-felted tables surrounded by chairs.  _ Fascinating. A gambling hall modeled after ancient Earth casinos. _ Spock doubted, however, that the casinos on Earth ever fell into such phenomenal disrepair. At a table near the center of the room he spotted Nyota. She was playing a card game with 2 Ferengi, a Romulan, a Denobulan, and several others of humanoid appearance. Spock stood near the doorway, watching the game progress. The game seemed similar to the Poker games that the human cadets in Starfleet enjoyed so much. The betting system seemed to use small cubes which, though painted, appeared to be fashioned out of some sort of metal.

Nyota had led several rounds of betting, her stack of cubes was rapidly dwindling as she continued to raise the stakes. Spock could not help but wonder if it was logical to offer such a wager when she appeared to only have 3 of the deck’s many cards in her hand. Spock was about to approach her when the Romulan stood suddenly, disruptor drawn. He and Uhura exchanged rapid words in Romulan, only several of which Spock was able to understand. Nyota raised her voice in what seemed a long-winded explanation of some sort and the Romulan, apparently placated, sat down once more. Uhura sat still for several moments before she pushed all of her remaining cubes into the center of the table. Shouts and exclamations from the others were silenced by the Human dealer who then addressed each in turn, some also put all of their cubes in the center, some angrily left the table. Nyota sat motionless through the whole ordeal. From his spot across the room Spock saw the dealer motion for Uhura to show her cards. He also saw Nyota’s other hand move slowly down to her belt where her phaser was clipped. She cautiously drew her weapon as she began to lay her cards down. It took only seconds for the others to see the cards she had played. The clamor was enormous. Several different players had drawn their weapons as well and were now firing haphazardly into the crowd, presumably trying to hit Uhura. Spock was by her side in an instant, he grabbed her arm and pulled her with him through the room, his own phaser drawn as he hurried her down the corridor and out of the building.

When they reached the street Nyota wrenched her arm out of the vulcan’s grasp. “Spock, don’t you dare touch me!”

“I am sorry, I intended only to remove you from danger.”

“Yes, Spock. Thank you so much. I clearly had no idea that they would react that way.”

“You are welcome, however your own actions seemed to indicate-“

“It was sarcasm, Spock. I knew what I was doing. I don’t know why you would even think for a second that I was not aware of the situation that I was in. I am a Starfleet officer! I am serving on the greatest ship the fleet’s ever seen! I was the top of my class and I do not need your Vulcan pity!”

“I must apologize for the events of the last day. I did not intend to hurt you, in fact, I have not intended for a single thing to happen as it has in over 24 hours.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“Nyota, when we began our relationship you said that you wanted me to understand that you would always be there for me. I must assume that this is still the case and that I can confide in you. I do not intend to excuse my actions, only to explain what happened and how so that you will be able to understand the logic in what must happen next.”

“And what’s that Spock? What’s going to happen next?”

“We will cease to be romantically or sexually involved. Although-“ he added, as his voice softened, “I would hope that we might maintain the friendship that we have shared.”

“We’ll have to see about that.”

“I must first explain to you the Vulcan mating cycle known as Pon Farr…”

***

 

Kirk had explored every single one of the computer’s holoroom options. He had abandoned the lodge look shortly after he finished sending out all crewmember shore leave instructions. Now, five hours later, Jim was sitting in on a lounge chair in the open doorway that led onto a small deck. Beyond the deck the ocean stretched out, crystal clear as the waves lapped up onto the beach just below the private deck.

Kirk had been through a number of holographic locations before he’d settled on this private beachfront room. The air was warm enough that he’d taken off his shirt and a pleasant breeze kept the room from feeling stale. He was watching the sea plants waving back and forth with the waves when the door to the room slid open behind him.

Spock raised an eyebrow in surprise at the remarkably different room. He was pleased that the captain had found a way to occupy his time while he had been with Nyota.

“Is the room to your liking now?”

Jim chuckled, “Yeah Spock, much better.” He stood up and crossed to his first officer standing just inside the room, “Do you like it?”

“I find the technology impressive. The breeze from the ocean is particularly fascinating.” Spock’s words were dry, but his eyes lingered on his captain’s chest, unable to tear his gaze away, “I can understand why you chose this program in lieu of the more icy climate.”

“I’m glad you can see the benefits.” A sly smile spread across Jim’s face as he stretched his arms over his head, teasingly lengthening his bare torso. “How was it?”

“Captain?” Spock’s mouth was slightly ajar as he watched the flexing of the human’s muscles.

“Your talk with Uhura, Spock.” Kirk lowered his arms and looked intensely at his first officer until he met his eyes. “You were gone for hours!”

“Yes, I apologize for failing to check in. I explained the situation to her and then we went back to her lodgings.”

Jim’s face darkened, “You slept together? Spock what were you thinking?”

“You did tell me to ‘let her down easy’. I do not see how engaging in sexual intercourse would be unfitting.” Kirk continued to gape at him, “Although you misunderstand. That is not what happened. She merely wanted to speak somewhere more private.”

“Damnit Spock! You could’ve said that sooner!” As Kirk shook his head he thought he saw a faint smile pass the Vulcan’s face before it vanished into an unreadable mask. “Well, how’d she take it at least?”

“Nyota is very upset.” Spock sat down on the edge of their bed, “I do not anticipate that she will be eager to interact with either of us in a non-professional setting any time soon. Yet she was willing to accept my explanation of Pon Farr to justify what she witnessed and of the unintentional bond as the reason we must forgo our relationship.” Kirk sat next to him, trying to think loving thoughts that he hoped would spill across their link as he put his arm around the vulcan’s shoulders. “It is curious, Captain,” Spock looked at him, a twinkle in his eye, “she seemed to grasp the concept of the bond much sooner than you were able to.”

Kirk punched Spock’s shoulder, “yeah well, you weren’t suddenly able to read her mind!”

“That is an accurate observation.”

Jim leaned his head against his first officer’s chest, “You know, it’s awfully warm in here.”

“I do feel somewhat overdressed given my present company.” Kirk sat back on the bed so that Spock could strip off his shirt. He cautiously put his hand out and touched the vulcan’s chest. The skin was cool and dry, a stark contrast to the human’s own rosy flushed sweat-washed skin.

_ This will be the first time that neither of us are in Pon Farr…  _ The human’s thought echoed distantly in the vulcan’s mind. 

“Yes Jim, the thought had occurred to me as well. It will be the first time that we will both get to experience the pleasure of one another.”

“When did you get so damn eloquent Spock?” Kirk ran his fingers across the vulcan’s thighs.

“I have always been this eloquent, I have simply had little occasion to speak this way in your presence.”

“Is that a Vulcan thing? Speaking eloquently to your mates?”

“It is a personal preference.”

Jim smiled, his eyes briefly met Spock’s before he lowered his gaze and reached out to undo the first officer’s trousers. “Do you want to meld again?”

Spock lifted his hips to allow the trousers to be removed, “I want that very much, however I would suggest that we do not meld each time we are sexually involved, it might be possible that we would become physically desensitized due to increased psionic stimulation.”

“Wow, okay. I think that was you saying ‘not this time’.”

Spock nodded as Jim leaned in to kiss him. The warm lips parted his own and he felt the human’s hot tongue slide into his mouth. His own joined in, cautiously tasting the captain’s tongue, feeling the captain inhale as he deepened the kiss even further.

Jim wasted no time in stripping off his own trousers and shorts, he lay back on the bed, his blood pounding in his ears as he began to harden under Spock’s watchful gaze. He was almost ashamed to be so exposed, yet he could feel the acceptance and the lust that the Vulcan felt through their bond and he let his eyes close as the warm breeze rippled through his hair.


	14. Chapter 14

Spock’s thin fingers brushed the back of the human’s neck in a gentle caress. He could feel the warmth, the sweat. He had always been fascinated by sweat, he knew that some humans found it repulsive, while others saw it as an accomplishment. He gingerly leaned into the human’s body and ran his cool tongue over the captain’s neck. Jim’s gasp accompanied the salty flavor. The Vulcan repeated his action, this time letting his mouth linger. Spock could feel Jim’s breaths coming quicker and he wrapped one arm around the human’s chest, pulling Jim’s naked back against his chest. He traced his hand lightly over the captain’s chest,  _ I want to be inside you once more _ . He felt Kirk’s body tremble and he realized that the thought had crossed the bond. Spock lowered his hand, gently, feeling the hair growing thicker as he wrapped his hand around the base of the human’s shaft. He moved slowly, his hand mostly squeezing the base in alternating rhythms, feeling the human’s need growing within him. He pulled his hand back, licking up his palm he returned to Jim, this time he began to twist up and down the length of him. Kirk’s head lulled back against Spock’s own and the Vulcan nipped playfully on the human’s ear causing Jim to yelp with surprise. His moans were becoming more constant now as the Vulcan continued to pump him to his full length.

Jim was trying not to let himself get too swept away, he knew that the Vulcan wasn’t gonna let him come like this. He knew Spock was going to bring him right to the edge and then stop. But as Jim lay there, feeling the vulcan’s sensitive fingers expertly working his cock, the cool breath on his ear, he felt something else. Spock’s erection was growing and Spock was holding Kirk so tightly against him that the vulcan’s cock was pressing against the human’s ass. Jim pushed back against the Vulcan, hearing the sharp intake of breath from his first officer as his hand stilled. He began to slowly move his ass against his first officer. Spock’s fingers hesitantly resumed their stroking and soon both men were moaning as Jim’s movements rocked against Spock’s body.

Spock had made up his mind. He let go of Jim’s cock abruptly, moving his body away from Kirk’s just as quickly. Jim rolled over and looked as if he was about to say something but Spock held up a hand. “I want you to get comfortable on the bed.” Kirk nodded and Spock brought several pillows to him to place under his body, “I would suggest you get on your hands and knees.” The human followed his instructions and Spock placed a hand squarely on the human’s head before forcing it down to the bed. Kirk now lay completely exposed, his ass raised as the Vulcan circled behind him. Spock knelt on the floor beside the bed, his face just at the level of the human’s beautiful opening. Spock inserted two of his fingers into his own mouth, trying to suppress a moan as he sucked on them while the human waited. He could feel Kirk’s anticipation, his excitement, his trust. Spock knew that the human wanted this, though he doubted it was more than he desired this right now. He slowly traced one of his wet fingers along the human’s cleft. He used the other hand to part the cheeks slightly more as he circled the human’s entrance with a teasing slowness. He could feel Jim trying to push back against him, but the vulcan’s strong hand kept him still as he slowly pressed into the human. He could feel the human trying not to resist, trying to relax and Spock attempted to telepathically relax his bondmate.

Jim relaxed a bit, his breathing heavy as he felt the vulcan’s finger slowly twisting in and out of him. He could tell that Spock was avoiding brushing his prostate on purpose and it was everything Kirk could do to not touch himself, but he knew that that was not what Spock wanted. Even though the Vulcan was teasing him, the sensation was amazing; the vulcan’s finger was thin, but very dexterous as it worked in and out of him, increasing its speed. A wave of pleasure hit Jim’s mind, not his own reaction- the sensation was coming from Spock. Jim angled his head slightly to see if he could see the Vulcan. Spock was kneeling beside the bed, his head thrown back and his lips parted as he continued to twist his finger inside the human’s body.  _ His fingers! _ Jim almost laughed, but the sight of the Vulcan, clearly so close to the edge made him grow impossibly harder. He squeezed his muscles playfully and the vulcan’s eyes shot open, he met Kirk’s gaze and, placing his free hand gently on the small of the human’s back, he removed his finger slowly.

“I am sorry, Jim,” He gasped, his forehead pressed in frustration against his partner’s thigh, “but I could not continue, the stimulation was too much.”

“That’s okay.” Jim was amused, but could not help feeling a bit disappointed, “what happens next?”

“With your permission I would like to try something new.”

Jim nodded and Spock sat back a bit, anticipating his next move. Again he gently parted the human’s cheeks a bit more. This time though, he leaned in and let his tongue flick the entrance of the human’s warm body. Spock felt Jim’s body melt a bit, the human’s moans were musical as the Vulcan once more pressed his tongue against the human’s tight hole. Jim’s thoughts were on fire. He could feel the human’s mind trying to call him back, trying to return his tongue, trying to make it continue forever. Spock brought his lips close to the human let his breath wash over the opening. He could hear Jim’s whimpers as he held this position, not touching, but breathing lightly on the human’s tight hole.

The Vulcan slowly moved further away, until he was once more kneeling upright. He took the opportunity to kiss the back of Jim’s thighs, once more eliciting a deep moan from his human bondmate.

Flattening his tongue he returned once more to the human’s ass. He pressed his flat tongue against the opening, removing it quickly and repeated this several times.

Spock pressed his mouth against Jim’s body, hoping to achieve greater depth by doing so and slowly pushed his tensed tongue into the human’s warm body. The sensation was amazing as he pushed his tongue farther into the human. Such a strange action, yet it is undeniably pleasurable for both participants. Spock curled the tip of his inhumanly long tongue down slightly, feeling a the stiffer surface of Jim’s prostate, Spock lightly flicked the gland with his tongue several times.

“Fuck Spock! I can’t- Oh fuck! Yes keep- yes!”

Spock kept his tongue stiff, he angled himself so that he could pull his tongue out slightly and then push it in just at the right angle to brush the prostate. Jim’s moans had become completely incoherent and Spock could feel that he was getting too close. Reluctantly, the Vulcan withdrew- ignoring the cries of protest from Jim. He stood quickly and once more spread his natural lubricant all along his own erection, he positioned himself behind the human, placing one hand firmly on the human’s back as a warning, and he pushed his cock inside the warm cavern.

Jim’s head was spinning with desire. He’d never experienced anything like that before and he could not even imagine how he’d never tried that. The vulcan’s cock was pulsing inside of him now and it was glorious. He felt his his body tighten and cried out once more before he came. Spock continued to pound into him for several more thrusts but was not far behind him. When the Vulcan came he felt the coolness leave the vulcan’s body into his own. Spock’s gasps and cries were magnificent as he collapsed against the human, then onto the bed beside him. They were both in awe as they drifted off to sleep.

Jim was awoken the next morning by his communicator beeping. He opened his eyes to find the same beautiful beach resort, the same fresh breeze and the same Vulcan by his side.  _ As long as this wasn’t all a dream.  _ He rolled out of bed and stumbled over to a table by the door where his communicator was sitting.

“Kirk here.”

“Damnit Jim it’s me. Where the hell are you?” Bones’ rough voice was unpleasantly loud in his quiet paradise. “I thought we were meeting at the ship at 0900 hours!” The Vulcan in bed stirred as the doctor’s voice broke the silence once more.  _ Damn. I forgot that I’d agreed to meet with him in the shore leave specifics. I’m not gonna have time to take a shower. _

“Aw shit, Sorry Bones. I can be back at the ship in about 10 minutes. I just woke up.”

“Rough night?”

“Not particularly rough actually.”

“I don’t want to hear it. Are you coming or not Jim?”

“I’m on my way.” Kirk hurriedly got dressed and lingered for a moment sitting on the bed before kissing his bondmate goodbye.

***

Kirk could tell from down the street that Bones was in one of his moods. As he walked up to the Enterprise he could see that it was already abuzz with activity. Wherever he looked there were engineering crew and spacestation workers who were performing minor repairs or major overhauls (if Scotty was having his way). Bones did not even wait for Jim to reach the ship, as soon as he saw the captain walking toward him he turned and marched onto the ship. Jim quickened his pace, not wanting to cross the doctor this early in the morning.

“Nice to finally see you this morning Captain.” Bones’ voice was gruffer than usual, that fact and the bags beneath his eyes told the captain that he had not slept.

“I’m so sorry Bones. I didn’t realize that I didn’t set any sort of alarm. I meant to, but then Spock-“ He stumbled over his words as he realized what he was saying, “Sent me some new info about an assignment I’ve had him working on… I guess I just got distracted last night.”

“Of course he’s behind this. Do you know he still hasn’t had his physical with me? I need to send my report back to Starfleet medical in less than 24 hours and that Vulcan swine refuses to get a checkup!”

“I’ll remind him, I’m sure he’ll do it today.” Kirk made a mental note to talk to Spock about that, he wondered briefly if he would one day be able to tell him something like that telepathically from such a distance, but he put the thought out of his mind, “Where do you want to meet? We need someplace where we can sit down and talk about crew fitness right?”

“Well Scott’s got his termites crawling through every inch of this place. Can we talk on the bridge?”

“Sure Bones.”

When they got to the bridge they were greeted by not one, but two different crews realigning the ship’s navigational system and weaponry.

“Let’s just meet in here.” Jim gestured to his ready room, following the impossibly more agitated doctor. Jim crossed to his desk, sitting in the chair before he looked up at the doctor, and froze. Jim’s heart skipped a beat and he felt a sinking feeling in his stomach. Leonard was standing in the middle of the room, holding the torn and stained science uniform that they had discarded yesterday after their encounter on the bridge.

“Jim- do you mind telling me what the hell’s going on?”


	15. Chapter 15

Spock stirred in his sleep, the warmth of the breeze tricking his semiconscious mind into believing that Jim was still beside him. They had both disregarded the sheets and now, still groggy, the Vulcan found his feet had become entangled in the sheets that had gathered at the end of the bed. He was roused from his resting state sooner than he would’ve liked by the struggle to free his feet. When he finally had conquered the sheets he let his body relax once more, lazily turning his head to observe his bondmate. He was momentarily horrified when he saw nothing but empty bed. The reaction was illogical. He knew that the Captain had many duties to attend to, even on shore leave, and would have only a fraction of the free-time that Spock himself would enjoy. The first officer sighed, he was not used to such strong emotional responses and he resolved to spend the time that his captain was away meditating, hoping to come to a place of balance with the new emotions stirred by the bonding.

***

Jim should’ve feigned ignorance, he should’ve made up some story about getting into a fight with the Vulcan, he should’ve told Bones that Spock had torn his uniform on the last mission, he should’ve done something, anything other than just sit there. Yet at that moment his mind was totally blank aside from the alarm bells ringing in his head. Bones was standing in the middle of his ready room holding Spock’s stained and torn uniform. The doctor’s face was suspicious, though, Kirk realized in retrospect, he most likely thought that Jim had harmed the Vulcan in some way. Jim had been the captain of the Federation’s Flagship, he had already mediated several interplanetary disputes and helped the federation avoid a number of unfortunate incidents, even wars, and yet here he was, confronted by his best friend and he could not think of a damn thing to say.

“What the hell is the matter with you Jim? Why is Spock’s uniform in here and what the hell happened to it?”

Kirk sat frozen, his survival instincts failing him right and left, finally he was able to choke out, “What?”

“Dammit Jim. What is this?” He had obviously given up on getting a straight answer from Kirk and had begun to examine the shirt more carefully. Before Jim could even think, Leonard got out his medical tricorder, checking the shirt for blood no doubt.

“Bones I don’t think-“ Kirk stopped when he saw the doctor’s eyes widen as he looked at the readings. “you need to worry…” he finished half-heartedly.

“I... I don’t know what I’m seeing here… I mean, hell, I know what I’m seeing,” he quickly lay the shirt down on a nearby table, “I know can’t be what it looks like here-“ he faltered, he hadn’t made eye contact with Jim yet, his brow was all furrowed in concentration as he tried to make sense of what his scanner had found on the shirt. “I mean, why would you be using Spock’s uniform?”

Kirk was taken aback; he had assumed that Bones would know exactly what was going on. He almost had to laugh at Leonard’s attempts to make Spock’s uniform, torn and stained with Jim’s semen, found in the captain’s private ready room into something other than the obvious. “It’s simpler than that, Bones.”

The doctor met his gaze for the first time, realization dawning in his face. “You’re telling me that you two… When did that happen?” He was incredulous, his eyes were wider than Jim had ever seen and his accent seemed thicker somehow.

“Well… that particular instance was last night after everyone had left the ship.” Jim couldn’t help but smirk, he knew that Bones was either going to be interested or disgusted, and either way he would probably also be furious, but Jim always enjoyed watching others catch up with him.

“You mean this happened more than once?” Jim wondered for a moment if Bones was going to faint, “How long have you have been fucking that green-blooded bastard?”

“It’s only been a day. It’s actually really complicated Bones so I should talk to him before I tell you anything. If you want, we can both come in for an exam, you can get his physical in, and we can inform you through the proper channels.”

“Look Jim, you don’t really need to tell me any of this, it’s none of my business anyway who you fuck, or how you fuck.”

“Actually, Bones, I do. The Starfleet regulations on personal relationships states that ‘all Starfleet personnel must obtain clearance from their medical officer before initiating an intimate relationship with an alien species’”

“Oh come on Jim! You know that no one follows that guideline. Hell, Lieutenant Uhura never came to me when she and Spock started dating.” Bones’ face darkened, “Jim- please tell me that she knows about this. I may not be a councilor, but if you two haven’t told her-“

“Oh she knows. She and Spock talked last night actually. I don’t think anyone really walked away happy, but it’s done with now.”

“Is it your personal mission to be a pain in the ass to everyone on your crew individually? Because you do a damn good job of it!”

“Look Bones, I know I didn’t have to tell you, and Spock probably would’ve preferred if I didn’t, but you’re my best friend and I don’t want to feel like I’m keeping something from you. Especially something this big.”

McCoy stood in silence for almost a minute, his eyes never left Jim’s own and the captain couldn’t help but wonder if he’d made a mistake telling Bones. “I’m glad you told me Jim. Can’t say I understand it, can’t even say I like it, but if you two want to come down to sickbay in a few hours to get your exams and follow regulations for once in your life, I’ll be there.”

“Thanks, Leonard.”

“I think the crew fitness evaluations can wait, I’m gonna have to go clear my head for a bit. Especially if I’m gonna have to deal with that pointy-eared devil while he’s in heat.”

_ Oh he’s not anymore. _ “Okay, Bones. We’ll see you in a few hours.”

***

The world around Spock was empty. His mind was deep in its meditation when he felt a new presence. The presence was not external, there was nothing beyond the limits of Spock’s vast consciousness, but rather the presence was in his meditation. He could feel sensation that could be likened to a nudging. As the vulcan’s body remained motionless he could feel his mind beginning to return to his physical being. The sensation was like rising, as the meditation had been like slowly falling, he now felt his mind slowly rising back to his body. When he was once more aware of his surroundings Spock slowly let his eyes flutter open. The presence had not left his mind, and he knew that his bondmate must be near. Moving slowly, deliberately, Spock stood. He surveyed the empty room with confusion. If he is not here, why do I feel his mind’s presence in my own? Once again, however, he felt the nudging sensation in his thoughts. He quickly stripped off his robe that he had worn for his meditation and, within the things that he had packed before leaving the ship, found a fresh Starfleet uniform to put on. Once dressed the Vulcan walked briskly through the hall, and then down onto the street where he Jim was waiting for him.

“How were you able to do that?” Spock’s voice was measured, but Kirk could clearly hear the excitement in it. Though whether he was really hearing it or simply feeling it was a question that the human wasn’t sure he could answer.

“A magician never tells his secrets Spock.”

The Vulcan cocked an eyebrow and his eyes narrowed, “I do not believe that you used magic to extend your psionic presence. Your idiom is, therefore, misplaced.” Spock’s eyes twinkled as he took a step closer, bringing himself much closer to Jim than he would normally be comfortable with, his hand rose to hover over the human’s face, “You are, of course, aware that I could take any information that I please from you if you choose to withhold it?” His voice was dark, yet soft and non-threatening as his other hand snaked around his bondmate’s waist.

“You wouldn’t dare.” Kirk challenged. A smile twitching on his lips as he leaned into the vulcan’s body. The tension was growing as they stood there, on the mostly deserted street, their bodies touching, warming one another until Jim broke away. _ I’m sorry. I want you too but we have other things to deal with first. _

Spock looked momentarily disappointed, but the emotional response vanished quickly as he straightened his uniform, “What sort of ‘things’ do we have to ‘deal with’.”

“I know you’re not going to like it Spock, but I need us to go see Bones. Together.” Jim could feel the frustration radiating from the vulcan’s mind, “You still need to get your physical done and…” Jim shifted his weight as he added; “I told McCoy about the two of us and I think we need to go talk to him about that.”

Spock took a step back, “I’m not sure… what would cause you to tell another officer about the nature of our relationship without first consulting me…”

“Look Spock, I’m sorry, It wasn’t like I just told him on a whim, we were meeting to go over crewmember fitness assessments when he found your uniform from last night. I’m sorry that I didn’t talk to you about it first, Spock, but any time shipmates enter into a new relationship you know that they are supposed to inform their CO and the CMO. I certainly didn’t mean for it to happen this way and I don’t want you to be upset with me.”

“I am not ‘upset’ with you. You acted rationally under the circumstances and I must face all of the consequences of our bond, even if I am not looking forward to this particular consequence.”

Jim reached out and took his bondmate’s hand, “Thank you.” He said quietly.

“May I ask what for?”

“For not being angry that I told Bones.”

“Anger is an emotional response Jim, and although you are no doubt aware that I sometimes experience emotional responses, I do not allow them to affect my judgments or reactions.” Spock’s fingers intertwined with Jim’s own, “Sometimes,” he squeezed slightly, “I think you forget that I am Vulcan.”

Kirk actually laughed out loud, squeezing Spock’s hand in turn, “As if you’d ever let me forget that you’re Vulcan. Besides, I think you sometimes forget that you are half human.”

“That is a fact of which I am constantly aware.”

***

Spock was pulling his shirt back over his head when Jim walked into sickbay. They had decided that Spock would get his physical done first, before Jim arrived so that Leonard would be more comfortable.

“You’re fit as a fiddle apart from your neurochemistry, which isn’t a bad thing, but it’s unusual that the levels would have shifted so perceptibly since your last reading.” Spock remained silent as Bones gestured that Jim could come in. “Listen Spock, if you don’t tell your medical officer when you have medically relevant changes in your condition and you know the cause, you can’t expect that I will be able to treat you when you don’t know the cause!”

“Bones,” Jim offered up from the corner, “maybe you should just let this one slide, I don’t think it’s gonna cause him any more problems…”

“Thank you Captain- but I think I’ll be in charge while we’re in sickbay.” McCoy spit out his words as he wheeled around to confront the expressionless Vulcan again. “Spock, I can’t officially force you to surrender medically relevant information to me with regards to your own health, but-” he continued, “ I can assure you that I will not tolerate being kept in the dark about Vulcan physiology- the time may come when I have to treat another Vulcan, and do you really want to run the risk that I might be unable to effectively treat them because you withheld information from me?” Bones’ voice had reached the point where it sounded almost hysterical and Jim wondered for a moment if he was going to harm Spock.

“Whatever is shared in sickbay with you is in full confidence right Bones?” Kirk stood as he spoke up, coming to the vulcan’s side. “You can’t share that information with anyone else?”

“Of course it is Jim!” Kirk heard the implied ‘damnit’ but brushed it off as he looked imploringly at Spock.

“Captain, I see what you are trying to do, I am familiar with the doctor’s oaths of confidentiality.” He turned his gaze to the doctor, “Doctor, I would ask that you understand that it is not out of personal distrust that I have chosen not to divulge this information, it is because it is culturally sacred, and already twice in the past 24 hours I have had to break that confidence and share with my crewmates what any other Vulcan would have been perfectly capable of keeping private.”

“Let me get this straight.” Bones’ brow furrowed as he tried to piece together the vulcan’s concerns. “You are worried that you are a sub-par Vulcan because you, without any Vulcan medical personnel on hand, have developed a condition unique to Vulcans that vulcans never talk about?”

“A crude assessment, but accurate.”

“Bones has a point Spock,” Jim put his hand on his bondmate’s shoulder, “Other Vulcans would have a support system, you’re all alone among a bunch of humans, they don’t need to explain the situation to anyone because it is clear what is happening when it happens, but if we don’t explain the situation to the Doctor he won’t be able to guarantee that you are in good health, all things considered.”

Spock sighed, he could see the logic in what the two men were saying, but he could not help but feel disappointment in himself that he would allow his Pon Farr to get so out of hand that now three separate humans would know about it. “Very well. Doctor- are you familiar with the Vulcan mating cycle known as Pon Farr?”

“I have heard rumors, but nothing more than that it happens. Nobody knows much about it.”

“I hope that even after this incident it will remain that way, you will be one of the few who does.”

Jim had sat down beside Spock on the examination table, he tried in vain to focus throughout the description that the Vulcan provided, but it was very different from the description that he had been given. Spock was outlining a myriad of physiological changes that are undergone during Pon Farr, from an elevation of core body temperature to an increased sensitivity of erogenous zones. He and the doctor spent almost an hour just discussing neurochemical changes undergone during the plak tow. Kirk was getting restless- he knew that it was good that the two men were discussing the details of the changes, but he also knew that this was just postponing the inevitable discussion about their… relationship.

Just as he was about to excuse himself to get some work done he heard Spock say, “That is where the captain’s involvement comes in.”

Bones was completely engaged in what Spock was saying, he didn’t even glance at Jim as Spock continued, “I informed the captain of the situation when I began to experience the early effects of Pon Farr. I believed, as is common in Vulcans, that the symptoms would have a relatively slow onset.”

“He was wrong.” Kirk interjected.

“Captain, please.” Spock’s tone was a mixture of amusement and exasperation as he continued, “He is, however, correct. My symptoms began to manifest more quickly than I could have foreseen and I found myself in the full throes of Pon Farr several hours before we reached the starbase. Jim offered himself to me as a temporary measure, until we reached the starbase.”

Bones’ eyes did meet Jim’s this time, Kirk wasn’t sure what his expression was, it almost seemed to be one of admiration,  _ whatever else he might be, I’ve got to hand it to him- Spock is a pretty great storyteller _ . “Both fortunately and unfortunately several things transpired which I did not intend. Lieutenant Uhura witnessed a moment of our more… intimate interaction.” Bones looked as if he was about to speak when Spock added, “I have since spoken with her and explained the situation. The other thing that I did not intend was that a telepathic mating bond was formed between myself, and the captain when I joined minds with him.”

“What does that mean, ‘a telepathic mating bond’?”

“Effectively we joined when we were connected on a fundamental level, both compatible as companions and mates. It is an incredibly rare phenomenon. One which even my parents did not share to this extent.”

“So you guys are what, soulmates or something?”

“That’s how he explained it to me.” Jim nodded, “We became linked telepathically”

“Wait a minute, you can give humans telepathic abilities this way?”

“Not exactly doctor,” Spock shook his head, “As you are aware, vulcans are touch telepaths, our psionic abilities are relatively limited when considering some other species such as betazoids, and therefore the link formed is almost exclusively a kinepsionic telepathy. Though Jim has shown a remarkably surprising aptitude, particularly for a human, for telepathic communication.”

“Great, so now Jim can annoy me without even having to speak?”

“I thought I already did that Bones?”

“I should add at this point that a telepathic mating bond does not necessarily bond the two individuals permanently, it does however, cause the non-vulcan to go through their own Pon Farr, with symptoms that are not unlike those of a vulcan’s Pon Farr. If the two are to be bonded then their link will continue beyond the culmination of their Pon Farr cycles.”

“So now you’re both in heat?”

“No. My own Pon Farr cycle had ended. I simply had to satisfy Jim’s needs to end his own as well.”

Bones was shaking his head, his brow furrowed and his jaw tight, “I’m not sure I ever needed to imagine that, but okay. So you both took care of business and now you’re mates? For life?”

Jim looked at Spock, he wasn’t sure and he was very curious how the vulcan would answer.

“Of course.”

Both humans exchanged a glance of surprise.

“And Jim’s okay with this is he?”

Jim looked back at Spock, to find that the vulcan was watching him expectantly, “Of course.” He smiled.

Bones shook his head, but a glance between the two of them told him everything he needed to know. With a sigh he made a note on his PADD, “Okay. Well, Mazel Tov.” He grunted, turning to leave the two lovebirds on their own. 

"Oh Bones,” Jim called after him, “I'm going to need you to take a look at that wrist again..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks everyone who's read and left feedback! I really appreciate it!


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